I would say the Ety HF5 (or ER4, if you're willing to spend more) with the $100 custom mold option they offer. Seems like a *great* fit for you (no pun intended)...
My gf's ears are small and can't fit alot of IEM's either. The best solution we've found were to use the small sillicone/oval tips that come with the Klipsch S4's. They work well on my W4's for her. The Westone housings seem to be small enough to fit in her ears, and the Klipsch tips were the most comfortable for her.
Exact same thing happened with my girlfriend. Her ears were so sore after trying a bunch of tips and the Klipsch eargels did the trick. She said they are the most comfortable tips and didn't cause earpain. I have been using them for years and they are indeed the best silicon tips on the market IME.
This is just me but imo thats is if you haven't tried it already is to get some different tip brands and sizes to see if that helps because for the type of sound you said you like the TF10's are perfect.
I had fit problems with the TripleFi 10 as well, but it may be worth it to the OP to try some of the extra long single flange tips from MeElectronics:
http://www.meelec.com/category_s/377.htm
Other than that, I'd add my voice to the other person who recommended the Klipsch Image x5. The x10 is even smaller, but has less treble and more bass. The only other earphone I can think of is the Etymotic Hf5 that is also quite small, but sounds sterile and analytical until you get used to small amounts of bass.
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