[Duggeh]

Theres a lot of creepy clingy strange guys out there with the social cohesion of a poop scoop. Being British, I, when faced with the prospect of talking to a person (male or female) whom I know or suspect to be a complete prat, have to just grin and bare it and look for the earliest polite oppertunity for escape, often this results in an accellerated draining of my glass or an unnessessary trip to the toilet.

Work parties also suck. This guy brought to you the worst of both scenarios. At least he isnt the norm. Most of us males are fine upstanding gentlemen of good manners and breeding.

 

[plainsong]

For the guys who think this is acceptable, newsflash: NO!

AC1's right, it's about context - at Hedonism? Sure! At a house warming party, with mom there, or having been sent home? Creeps a bit.

And it's completely normal. There's always at least one guy to avoid like that. We girls tend to gravitate towards the ones who speak in complete sentences.

I don't know if AC1 wanted to get with the girl or not, but his approach is far less creepy.

 

[Wmcmanus]

Quote:

Originally Posted by plainsong We girls tend to gravitate towards the ones who speak in complete sentences.

True enough, at least when you're just in the mood for talking. But when it comes to taking one home, most women grab the brainless thugs. They in turn know this, so they will push the envolope to see what kind of woman they're dealing with, or, perhaps they already know that much, and are more interested in learning what kind of mood she's in at the moment.

 

[plainsong]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wmcmanus True enough, at least when you're just in the mood for talking. But when it comes to taking one home, most women grab the brainless thugs. They in turn know this, so they will push the envolope to see what kind of woman they're dealing with, or, perhaps they already know that much, and are more interested in learning what kind of mood she's in at the moment.

We don't all enjoy putting ourselves in situations where rape is a very real possibility. I only slept with guys I trusted (should that be past tense? It infers I don't trust my husband.

) I can't speak for every girl obviously, but what you're describing is just dangerous.

 

[jpelg]

Quote:

Originally Posted by plainsong I can't speak for every girl obviously, but what you're describing is just dangerous.

We are talking about a wide-range of social & sexual behaviour. Obviously not all, but unfortunately many, many young women do act out this way and often put themselves at risk. I also know quite a few women who believe they are in control of their sexuality and can do what they wish as much as any man can.

 

[plainsong]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jpelg We are talking about a wide-range of social & sexual behaviour. Obviously not all, but unfortunately many, many young women do act out this way and often put themselves at risk. I also know quite a few women who believe they are in control of their sexuality and can do what they wish as much as any man can.

I'd count myself as someone who is in control of my sexuality, and part of that is choosing who I sleep with, not letting him choose me, not settling, not putting myself in a situation where I'm not going to enjoy myself.

A bit OT but there's a bit of a scandal here from the Finnish version of Big Brother. The way my husband tells the story, is that a guy and a girl on the show got drunk, she passed out, and he was just going to do his thing anyway until the show interferred and now he's off the show and the police are investigating.

Now it's usually not the brightest candles who watch this show, but the text messages that scroll during the show say he should come back, she asked for it. Okkkkkkay, rule of thumb - if she can't communicate then the answer's no. And yet, these young idiots (male and female I'd assume) think this is acceptable.

There's a bit of blame on both sides I think, but you should feel reasonably safe with cameras trained on you on live tv, and no means no full stop, so it's him I think needs his butt thrown in jail.

But anyway, that was OT, but an interesting story I thought. So back to the topic, just don't go after girls that don't look like they have any self respect and you should have a fun time.

 

[jpelg]

Quote:

Originally Posted by plainsong I'd count myself as someone who is in control of my sexuality, and part of that is choosing who I sleep with, not letting him choose me, not settling, not putting myself in a situation where I'm not going to enjoy myself.

Why is "Yes" not as much as in control as "No" for whatever reason or criteria a person chooses? It certainly does not preclude enjoyment.

We're still talking well outside the realm of anything forced here from the OP.

 

[plainsong]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jpelg Why is "Yes" not as much as in control as "No" for whatever reason or criteria a person chooses? It certainly does not preclude enjoyment. We're still talking well outside the realm of anything forced here from the OP.

In a way it is forced because he's moving on someone in a relationship, not according them the proper respect as people, but as objects there for his pleasure. No, he's not overtly forced himself on anyone, but how far would he go? He's a stranger, so I don't know. But I can only judge that he has a high creep factor.

This is why people like this give off that creep factor, it's your own built in alarm system. Even guys since it, hence the story.

I never said yes wasn't in control, I'm just saying part of using that control is picking who you say yes to. And of course no always means no, end of story. Still, using the pin the tale on the donkey method of choosing is dangerous.

Otherwise, I'm not sure what you're getting at.

 

[BlindTiger]

I don't get how this guy is a "creep"?
Creep to me are the stories you hear about the pervies on the subway who starts self gratifying in front of a woman, among other things they do.
Call me old fashioned. My friend would call what this guy did as "copping" a sketch off a lady. (or, to "conversate" in current vocabulary)

 

[plainsong]

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlindTiger I don't get how this guy is a "creep"? Creep to me are the stories you hear about the pervies on the subway who starts self gratifying in front of a woman, among other things they do. Call me old fashioned. My friend would call what this guy did as "copping" a sketch off a lady. (or, to "conversate" in current vocabulary)

And that's why he's single. LOL.

So it's ok at a _house warming_ party to show up with your mom, then send her packing, and proceed to move in on the lesbians. Honestly life is not a **** film.

Come on, he's not exactly a real catch is he?

It was just a funny story about the guy you don't wanna go home with, and who just doesn't get it.

 

[jpelg]

ps -

There are too many possibilities of needs & wants to be satisfied, on both sides, to discuss fully in a format such as this. But you are reading far too much into the situation described in the original post.

And while your perspective is well taken, I contend it does not even come close to matching all the of the many people in this world, male or female. On top of that, and more specfically, you are contending that the women involved in the OP cannot choose to either fend off the onslaught of this "creepy" man, or perhaps go with him. How demeaning for these women that you don't even know!

My point is that some people are married/in committed relationships, some people are single. Some people are either way by choice, some wish they could be the other. Regardless, and simply stated, how one chooses to meet their own needs & wants is their business as long as it doesn't hurt anyone and all parties involved are on fully on board. To declare that one set of rules meets all people's needs is naive, if not myopic.

 

[Kirosia]

Was the creep one of these guys:

 

[jpelg]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kirosia Was the creep one of these guys

Or one of these:

 

[swt61]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Duggeh Theres a lot of creepy clingy strange guys out there with the social cohesion of a poop scoop. Being British, I, when faced with the prospect of talking to a person (male or female) whom I know or suspect to be a complete prat, have to just grin and bare it and look for the earliest polite oppertunity for escape, often this results in an accellerated draining of my glass or an unnessessary trip to the toilet. Work parties also suck. This guy brought to you the worst of both scenarios. At least he isnt the norm. Most of us males are fine upstanding gentlemen of good manners and breeding.

Being American, I, when faced with the prospect of talking to a person (male or female) whom I know or suspect to be a complete prat, have only to tell them to get the ****** out of my face!

You Brits are very polite, but it does make you endure more than I am willing to.

 

[Jahn]

C'mon now, it's obviously the guy in the middle- he's the life of the party!