[PFKMan23]

Honestly I think that's a hard question to answer. I don't think getting physical is a good thing but then again he did do a thing that was more than just out of line. In that situation I don't think I would have necessarily just stayed as calm as you did. I think you would have been justified if you had gotten physical. Would it have been the right choice? That is another issue...

 

[rickcr42]

Quote:

You know, I'm sorry, but that's really old fashioned closed-minded thinking. There are many different ways to percieve that someone has "wronged" you, and they differ greatly from person to person.

Yeah.Old fashioned.From a time when folks were actually civil because they knew there were limits to what they could impose on others without consequences.because there was a known end result to certain things there was rarely a NEED to go that far and respect for others was the way

The NEW way is so much better where snot nosed brats (not age related but punk related) do everything they can to piss off another man then cry cop or sue when they get the result they knew it was leading to.much better though those type have zero shot at ever becoming a man

BTW-I AM old fashioned and maybe even out of fashion being 50 but trust me,I don't get bothered more than one time by any human and I not only will take that over passing someone elses muster of what is "proper" but have raised all three of my sons to take zero crap from any human if they felt that person crosses certain known lines......such as coming to my house and scaring my family at which time it would be over before I even knew what was going on

 

[bpm2000]

Quote:

Originally Posted by quoteunquote i'll keep his information private. would i have been wrong to take it to a physical level? i don't think so. but i'm sure others might feel differently. then again, you never know until something like this happens to you. when it's your mother and your sister.

Hell no. And this is before they got other people involved. I've done two deals in person and they both went smoothly. If someone tried to pull some s**t during one or came to my place of residence they'd be in trouble. That said,I think your resistance in dealing with him facetoface was probably the best idea. (if you had kicked his ass I would totally see that as good in my book tho

)

 

[saab]

Man, that is crazy. Did you at any time during the 5 day interval between payment and attempted shipping let him know about the delay? I don't know what I would have done; what a tough situation. I don't think it is against the law to sit in a car outside of someone's house, so I don't think violence would have been in order. It sounds like you did the right thing in threatening him with the authorities.

Best of luck, and let's hope this was a one time head-fi occurance.
John

 

[quoteunquote]

that's why i put the package outside my front door. i was honestly afraid of what would come over me if i had to stand and look at him face to face.

 

[Jahn]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zanth BTW: Jahn, this is one of the funniest things I've read in ages: "i'm going to sic my Shiba on your 'nads."

Shibas can get darn prehistoric on your goods if you don't watch out. Not my doggy, but here's an example - and this guy's just yawning!

 

[Shizelbs]

If it had been me I would have been more assertive. I would have given him the headphones as I called the cops. I'd tell him he could wait, or get the hell out of dodge. Honestly, once I had known he had harrassed my own mother, I probably would have gone ballastic on him, and felt no remorse for doing so. You played it on the cool end of the spectrum, for which he did not deserve.

I would report him to his ISP and local authorities.

 

[quoteunquote]

i still feel uneasy. if i contact the police, there isnt anything they can do now, right?

 

[Mercuttio]

Quote:

Originally Posted by rickcr42 Yeah.Old fashioned.From a time when folks were actually civil because they knew there were limits to what they could impose on others without consequences.because there was a known end result to certain things there was rarely a NEED to go that far and respect for others was the way The NEW way is so much better where snot nosed brats (not age related but punk related) do everything they can to piss off another man then cry cop or sue when they get the result they knew it was leading to.much better though those type have zero shot at ever becoming a man BTW-I AM old fashioned and maybe even out of fashion being 50 but trust me,I don't get bothered more than one time by any human and I not only will take that over passing someone elses muster of what is "proper" but have raised all three of my sons to take zero crap from any human if they felt that person crosses certain known lines......such as coming to my house and scaring my family at which time it would be over before I even knew what was going on

Point blank: Might does not equal right.

 

[mbriant]

Quote:

i still feel uneasy. if i contact the police, there isnt anything they can do now, right?

Are you sure you're not blowing this whole thing just a little out of proportion. I hate to disagree with the lynch mob, but, without hearing the other person's side of the story, I don't think it's really fair for everyone to so eagerly get out the torches and pitchforks.

I'm not saying you don't have a reason to be upset, but on the same token, none of us know what sort of communications went on prior to all of this. Had you promised you would ship it sooner than 5 days? Did you keep him informed of the delays in sending it out? And really, although you're telling us you were going to send them out that day, neither the buyer, or any of us for that matter, knew or know that that is indeed a fact. Perhaps you might have wound up with another "problem" getting to the post office that day as well. Again, none of us know that. The buyer certainly wouldn't have.

I'm not calling you a liar by the way, just trying to say there are two or three sides to every story. In all fairness, in most cases people feel that 5 days to get to the post office ... unless specifically discussed and agreed upon ( and again, even on the 5th day, the package was not yet in the mail) I think 2 or 3 days after receiving someone's money is a more generally acceptable length of time to expect the item to be on it's way.

And of course people are and should be wary of fraudsters on the net. This person doesn't know you....all they know is that you've had their money for 5 days and you had yet to take the package to the post office.

Again, I don't mean to offend or accuse, but I don't think it's right for everyone to convict this other person of some sort of crime, without at least hearing their side of the story.

From what you've told us, this person did nothing illegal. Sitting in their car or spending 10 minutes opening and looking at the product they just received, isn't against the law. Was anyone threatened with physical violence? Was this person standing on the street yelling obscenities at you? What did he do to your mom or sister that made them so fearful? All I'm reading is that he asked if a package had been sent out. Reading your first post, it comes across to me that you yourself came on rather aggressively BOTH times you called him on the phone.

And you are even now considering calling the police? What makes you think you are in some sort of danger at this point?

 

[quoteunquote]

i did tell him i would try and get them out by tuesday. i couldn't get a ride down to the PO and i informed him of that. showing up at my house was bullsh|t. maybe if he emailed me and said.."hey, i'm going to be in your area soon, would it be easier if i just came by and picked them up?" that would have been completely acceptable. instead, he just shows up..confronts my mom when she's walking to her car. scares the hell out of her. and then proceeds to sit in front of my house until i called him.

sure, i was wrong for not getting them out when i said i would, but i told him what was going on. i'm still thinking of calling the police, because honestly it's a scary situation. this guy knows where i live. i never said going through the package for 10 minutes was against the law. but i still feel like what he did was wrong. and handled completely wrong.

 

[rickcr42]

Quote:

Might does not equal right.

It sure does keep the riff raff in line that otherwise would impose and I truly pity the person who can not physically or through sheer force of will protect their own family from harm.

Quote:

eagerly get out the torches and pitchforks

partial to a cut down louseville slugger myself

long enough reach to get it done but short enough to swing full speed and if you miss recover for the second shot.I sleep with mine under the bed.Home invasion ? Not my house

 

[quoteunquote]

damn, this guy is lucky he didnt show up at rickcr42's house.

 

[perplex]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mbriant Are you sure you're not blowing this whole thing just a little out of proportion. I hate to disagree with the lynch mob, but, without hearing the other person's side of the story, I don't think it's really fair for everyone to so eagerly get out the torches and pitchforks. I'm not saying you don't have a reason to be upset, but on the same token, none of us know what sort of communications went on prior to all of this. Had you promised you would ship it sooner than 5 days? Did you keep him informed of the delays in sending it out? And really, although you're telling us you were going to send them out that day, neither the buyer, or any of us for that matter, knew or know that that is indeed a fact. Perhaps you might have wound up with another "problem" getting to the post office that day as well. Again, none of us know that. The buyer certainly wouldn't have. I'm not calling you a liar by the way, just trying to say there are two or three sides to every story. In all fairness, in most cases people feel that 5 days to get to the post office ... unless specifically discussed and agreed upon ( and again, even on the 5th day, the package was not yet in the mail) I think 2 or 3 days after receiving someone's money is a more generally acceptable length of time to expect the item to be on it's way. And of course people are and should be wary of fraudsters on the net. This person doesn't know you....all they know is that you've had their money for 5 days and you had yet to take the package to the post office. Again, I don't mean to offend or accuse, but I don't think it's right for everyone to convict this other person of some sort of crime, without at least hearing their side of the story. From what you've told us, this person did nothing illegal. Sitting in their car or spending 10 minutes opening and looking at the product they just received, isn't against the law. Was anyone threatened with physical violence? Was this person standing on the street yelling obscenities at you? What did he do to your mom or sister that made them so fearful? All I'm reading is that he asked if a package had been sent out. Reading your first post, it comes across to me that you yourself came on rather aggressively BOTH times you called him on the phone. And you are even now considering calling the police? What makes you think you are in some sort of danger at this point?

I agree. It's not like this guy was outside and he was burning crosses on your lawn. He was just sitting in his car waiting for you to confront him. Sure he's an absolute weirdo but from what you've said, a harmless one.

 

[Sleestack]

I pretty much have the same take. The guy certainly didn't need to show up at the house, but unless he threatened you or your family he really didn't do anything illegal. It is possible that he thought you were going to cheat him, in which case his actions are not totally out of line... although not the way i would handle things. You should take some accountability for the delay in shipment. If you call the police, they won't get involved because nothing illegal happened. You have the guy's name and address right? If you are really concerned, go file a report so it is on record... otherwise, next time, require feedback and get your package out on time.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mbriant Are you sure you're not blowing this whole thing just a little out of proportion. I hate to disagree with the lynch mob, but, without hearing the other person's side of the story, I don't think it's really fair for everyone to so eagerly get out the torches and pitchforks. I'm not saying you don't have a reason to be upset, but on the same token, none of us know what sort of communications went on prior to all of this. Had you promised you would ship it sooner than 5 days? Did you keep him informed of the delays in sending it out? And really, although you're telling us you were going to send them out that day, neither the buyer, or any of us for that matter, knew or know that that is indeed a fact. Perhaps you might have wound up with another "problem" getting to the post office that day as well. Again, none of us know that. The buyer certainly wouldn't have. I'm not calling you a liar by the way, just trying to say there are two or three sides to every story. In all fairness, in most cases people feel that 5 days to get to the post office ... unless specifically discussed and agreed upon ( and again, even on the 5th day, the package was not yet in the mail) I think 2 or 3 days after receiving someone's money is a more generally acceptable length of time to expect the item to be on it's way. And of course people are and should be wary of fraudsters on the net. This person doesn't know you....all they know is that you've had their money for 5 days and you had yet to take the package to the post office. Again, I don't mean to offend or accuse, but I don't think it's right for everyone to convict this other person of some sort of crime, without at least hearing their side of the story. From what you've told us, this person did nothing illegal. Sitting in their car or spending 10 minutes opening and looking at the product they just received, isn't against the law. Was anyone threatened with physical violence? Was this person standing on the street yelling obscenities at you? What did he do to your mom or sister that made them so fearful? All I'm reading is that he asked if a package had been sent out. Reading your first post, it comes across to me that you yourself came on rather aggressively BOTH times you called him on the phone. And you are even now considering calling the police? What makes you think you are in some sort of danger at this point?