[Vicomte]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Edwood /img/forum/go_quote.gif Instead of just "You're Welcome" I find that giving out a pretzel says so much more. -Ed

Churros ain't got shiz on da pretz, yo.

Reppin'.

 

[daycart1]

I thought that mentioning pretzels was an automatic ban. (OOPS

)

BTW: My wife and I like to say polite stuff in restaurants and the like--back in Cali we often got weird looks. It goes down better here in North Carolina.

 

[ken36]

Getting very close to my bedtime folks, or The Sopranos, which ever comes first.

We certainly learned a lot about each other haven't we?

For the young guys: Say you meet a very nice young lady and it's instant attraction, she comes from a well established wealthy family and you are going to meet them tonight. Would you consider losing your "you guys" vocabulary?? Something to think about. Cheers!

Gosh, I hope I parsed correctly.

 

[lmilhan]

Quote:

Originally Posted by shigzeo /img/forum/go_quote.gif but, anyone as the op said who says 'no problem' to me will not get a tip. similarly, you're welcome will also get reduced tip.

So exactly what would a waiter / waitress have to do in order to get a proper tip from you, stand on their head and shoot wooden nickles out of their *****es?

Seriously though, how would you expect a waitress to respond to a "thank you" from you, if "no problem" or "you're welcome" isn't an acceptable response?

Just curious.

And for the record, being so harsh as to not leave a tip, AT ALL based solely on the fact that the only thing a waitress did wrong in your eyes was say 'no problem' in response to a 'thank you' is just begging to have your food spit into (or worse) at your next meal.

Karma can be a real bitch sometimes, so be careful.

 

[TenaciousO]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ken36 /img/forum/go_quote.gif What would happen, if the President Of The United States walked into the room where you are now. Let's say you oppose all of his politics. Would you stand? Would you call him Mr. President? Would you respect the presidency, if not the man. My point is simple, we all deserve respect. I lied before. I only go to two restaurants. The staff, of both establishments, is properly trained and treat me and my family with deference. I never have to say a word.

I hope you're not implying that you should somehow be compared to the President. That would be terrible for two reasons. First, I mean no insult, but you're probably not as important as the President. Second, I think there are a lot of people in the world who'd like to punch him in the face.

Interestingly, your statement that I bolded above is my belief as well, but it's so strange to me that a person who holds such a belief is so disrespectful to service staff. If I were waiting on you, I would view your instructions as patronizing and degrading.

Edit: I goofed. I completely missed the last sentence of ken36's second quoted paragraph so the second paragraph of my response is inapplicable. I apologize to ken for my mistake.

 

[Klarus]

To be fair, TenaciousO, Ken did say that he and his wife only frequent two restaurants, and that he never does say those things. They're his expectations, and they are consistently met by the wait staff.

As for me, I just try to be myself, or nice, to wait staff, but I don't generally expect to be treated fantastically as a 20-something at a place I don't know the servers. Regardless, I know how difficult customers can be, so I understand where they're coming from (hooray, customer service!). But that wouldn't excuse poor manners on the server's part, not at all.

And as for "you're welcome" vs. "no problem", like other people said--it's situational. I do like "my pleasure", "glad I could help", or "thank you", again, depending on the situation. I love English.

 

[TenaciousO]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Klarus /img/forum/go_quote.gif To be fair, TenaciousO, Ken did say that he and his wife only frequent two restaurants, and that he never does say those things. They're his expectations, and they are consistently met by the wait staff.

Oops, I overlooked that part in my excited state. My apologies to Ken then.

All I'm really trying to say is that respect is a two-way street. The servers should be mindful and pay customers at least a certain minimum level of respect, but customers should also give some respect to their servers, and I think this applies to any situation regardless of differences in age, social status, etc.

 

[fraseyboy]

No-one ever said Your Welcome in New Zealand... I think that term is only used in the USA. I never heard it said here.

 

[splaz]

I personally don't really understand why some people get so worked up on manners, like as said above certain responses aren't acceptable.

To me, I couldn't care less what they say as long as they are genuine about it. Like I personally would rather some scruffy waiter say "No problem man" yet they actually mean it over some stiff well dressed waiter that says "It was my pleasure" down the length of his nose.

 

[Superpredator]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ken36 /img/forum/go_quote.gif "you guys"

is about 100 times better than yous guys.

 

[EyeAmEye]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ken36 /img/forum/go_quote.gif What would happen, if the President Of The United States walked into the room where you are now. Let's say you oppose all of his politics. Would you stand? Would you call him Mr. President? Would you respect the presidency, if not the man. My point is simple, we all deserve respect. I lied before. I only go to two restaurants. The staff, of both establishments, is properly trained and treat me and my family with deference. I never have to say a word.

I wouldn't pay him a moment's attention (not specifically for this president, mind you).

Back to the matter at hand, I don't get wrapped up in words, so "you're welcome", "no problem" and all the others don't mean much to me. If I do something that earns a "thank you", the response is already implied by the action, so I don't see the point. If at all, I'll give a small nod and be done with it (most of the time not). Way too much formality in the world, and bones to pick when someone doesn't follow the formality. I also don't put too much in the "thank you" in the first place, as in many cases it seems like an automated response, and the person that just thanked you only a moment ago will be inconsiderate thereafter. The less talk the better.

 

[virometal]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ken36 /img/forum/go_quote.gif For the young guys: Say you meet a very nice young lady and it's instant attraction, she comes from a well established wealthy family and you are going to meet them tonight. Would you consider losing your "you guys" vocabulary?? Something to think about.

I would not in a million years. But let me pose a question to you. Let's say I didn't honor the decorum of the class structure and used the "you guys" vocabulary after which the family disapproved of me. Who was worse as a human being? The family that judged me by my speaking, or me who did not treat them as they felt they should be treated? It's an honest question. I'm not sure myself.

With all due respect Ken, there is a different take on The Queen. I along with others (the filmmaker for one

) felt the movie was really about how out of touch she was while she sheltered herself on the estate. The film wasn't about the cordiality of manners, but how manners sometimes get in the way of really communicating. The queen was a ridiculous figure.

 

[ken36]

Is it possible that formality stems from structure? Would structure indicate the absence of chaos? Is the USA and what we call the civilized world based on law? Aren't there informal laws dictating table manners, social etiquette, and plain old common sense?

Is this entire thread, just under the political correctness radar? Would a discussion of political correctness be political? I think not, but then I am not a moderator.

 

[craiglester]

I pretty much always use "You're welcome", it seems a lot more polite to me than "No problem", which gets used a lot around here at work and always sounds insincere to me.

 

[EyeAmEye]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ken36 /img/forum/go_quote.gif Is it possible that formality stems from structure? Would structure indicate the absence of chaos? Is the USA and what we call the civilized world based on law? Aren't there informal laws dictating table manners, social etiquette, and plain old common sense? Is this entire thread, just under the political correctness radar? Would a discussion of political correctness be political? I think not, but then I am not a moderator.

Formality is nothing more than a means to control one's behavior. No individuality in formality, just do what everyone else does, an automaton. There is a reason table manners, social etiquette and plain old common sense aren't formal law, and that's because, though they may be pleasant, there is no necessity in them. Society can function well enough in their absence.

Besides, who decides what the proper formality is, and why should everyone follow it? The intention is far more important than the formality of a situation. As I stated in my previous post, what does a "thank you" or "you're welcome" mean when the person offering it doesn't really mean it?