[MuZI]

In cases like this one, i find the courted marriages to be a good fix.

The parents set up their children to be married and live happily together no matter what and you love the other person just because you are forced to.

Then ofcourse people whine that they don't get a chance to date and find their one true love...

 

[Bittergourd]

Sorry to be a little off-topic,
but I have to comment on this quote:

Quote:

Originally Posted by kramer5150 SHE LOVES RUSH, DREAMTHEATER and AEROSMITH!!!! Try finding an Asian gal (my preference) with those musical tastes!!!

Forget about liking,
it's hard even to find an Asian guy that have heard of these bands....

I am an Taiwanese student studying in Toronto,
and I am tired of explaining the greatness of Dream Theater, or the genre "rock" even, to my other Asian friends.

 

[crazyfrenchman27]

I'm married to my work.

Women are too unstable and frustrating for me at this point in my life.

-Matt

 

[CSMR]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tuberoller Ok, I know I'm picky and I'm sure most of the women I've met feel I have some serious flaws too but c'mon,who wants to settle for less than what they really want?

Your flaws are greater than those you perceive in these people because you have not respect for God or for the women you are talking about.

 

[stevesurf]

Quote:

Originally Posted by CSMR Your flaws are greater than those you perceive in these people because you have not respect for God or for the women you are talking about.

#1 There's no reason to bring religion into this thread. #2 Do you respect your significant other 100% of the time?

 

[CSMR]

1: I wasn't
2: I don't have a "significant other". But if you want to call me flawed too anyway you can and you would be right.

 

[lini]

Quote:

Originally Posted by CSMR Your flaws are greater than those you perceive in these people because you have not respect for God or for the women you are talking about.

Oh, come on, you'd better show a bit more tolerance yourself.

That's a typical Tuberoller outburst, with Fred needing to vent some frustration - and not even much of a thick macho layer on top of it this time.

Subtract that, and your picked quote boils down to something like: Man, it's really hard to find an attractive female soulmate for a good relationship. I'm so tired of all the mismatches.

And btw, I'm sure it's not in the interest of this forum to post one's judgement on other users' respect for God - especially not based on what was quite obviously a rant. But I guess you should also consider that he's only given some examples - examples to point out the amount of mismatch, which probably are the more obvious, the better one knows Fred. But I'm pretty sure that these are only some anchors to fix that general feeling of disappointment when something promising turns into something between "what a pity - unfortunately this won't work" and "silly me - how could I ever think this would work?". In large or intensive quantities, this easily results in: "What a *insert your favourite four-letter-word here*ing waste of time! Why do I always run into the wrong ones?!?".

So: Be a man, Arthur Putey - and take a rant as a rant!

*mimes the announcer's voice* And next week in "Dairy Psychiatrists" we'll tell you all you ever wanted to know about "pair therapy for nymphomaniac schizophrenics". Stay tuned!

Grinnings from Hannover!

Manfred / lini

 

[Hey_Its_Cole]

I just got out of a serious relationship (well serious to her LOL) because I found her to be one of those girls that completely changes things about herself because I like them. For instance, she began listening to country because I like country, she moved out of her place because I did not like her roomates, she backed off on drinking because I was tired of drinking, she allways went a long with what I wanted to do and never made decisions, and this is only getting started. I went into it wanting something serious but found myself almost playing a parenting roll. I am in college dating is suposed to be fun. She had no ambitions and worked as a dance instructor and a waitress and never had any money. She got mad when I went to pick up some homework from my friend Heathers apartment LOL. I finally had enough and when I broke things off she tried to hang out with my friends (not mutual friends) to get at me. I am so fed up with women as the past few I have dated have all acted like this. I envy my parents as the way they described dating at my age was not like this at all. I just want a girl who is pretty (not a problem to find), smart (hard to find), ambitous (hard to find), not afraid to be themselves (hard to find), and one who is fine if I want to go do my own thing (impossible to find). My mom says most women are so screwed up today that she feels sorry for us LMAO. I just can not seem to find anyone my age with a maturity level remotely close mine. So I am done with my rant. Time to hear some others.

 

[Vertigo-1]

I'm a pretty young guy myself...no girlfriend, never even went on a date in my entire life for that matter. The more relationships I observe around me, the more I'm convinced that I want to remain single forever. It's honestly just the smart thing to do. All of my friends that have or had girlfriends all seem to either just end up suffering immensely, whether it be from arguing or breakups, or end up becoming a slave to their significant other. Even older adults I know that are married seem to end up getting divorced and whatnot. It's so ridiculous. Particularly in light of the amount of effort men need to spend to get a woman.

The way I see it...relationships are ultimately based on emotions. Emotions change like sand. Why make major life affecting decisions based upon something as changeable as emotions? Just learn to harden your heart against such emotions.

 

[Fizzmix]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Vertigo-1 It's honestly just the smart thing to do.

As a young person as well, this statement seems crazy to me. There's a reason people are constantly looking for relationships, and while I'm sure many cynics would attribute this to some underlying lack of emotional independence, there is just something at our core (even if it's simply the subconscious desire to mate) that tells the majority of us to find a person to share our lives with.

If by smart you mean rational, I would likely agree, but I believe that the fact that humans more often act on emotional whims than from an intellectual base is indicative of our nature.

 

[Glod]

IME, the best relations all of a sudden just manifest them selves in times when one isn’t really looking for a relation.

BTW. What is this focus on looks all the time? In my experience that is a dumb and discriminating filter and you will miss a lot of nice persons. Yes, I know the cliché and all that, but I have found it to be true. Glossy-paper-like-beauty (no offence, models at Head-Fi) is like a painting you hang on the wall: It looks great the first month, and then you don’t see it any more.

 

[mbriant]

Quote:

However, as I might have a bit more experience in living single, hear the warning: One really gets the hang of it over time. Plus one gains a lot of spare time for perfecting one's little screwedness(es) - with the final goal being The Guru of Screwdom Nirvana.

ROTFLMAO ! I'm glad I'm not the only one. I met my first "girlfriend" in grade 4 and up until my marriage ended nearly 10 years ago I never went longer than perhaps a month without being in some sort of relationship. Over the years I've had a couple of long term relationships as well as several not-so-long. I was married for 13 years and after that ended nearly a decade ago, I entered into a rather enjoyable, long distance relationship with a woman who lives 2500 miles from me. It was as good as being single with the benefit of having someone to talk to (and other things) when you really needed it. We only got to see each other 3 or 4 times per year and it was like a fresh new exciting relationship every time we met. But that ended nearly two years ago after a 7 year run, so realy I've had 10 years to get the hang of living single and perfecting my "screwedness(es)" I'm really good at it now too....as close to perfection as I want to get. So good in fact that I don't think I'll ever be able to get back to a normal ( whatever that is ) existence again. I have to say, despite the odd small bout of lonliness and sometimes feeling the peer pressure of being the odd man out, there's a lot I like and appreciate about being single.

 

[Old Pa]

Sorry things didn't work out with your wife. From the things I remember you saying about her over the past years (including, but not limited to, how she and her pistol saved your posterior) she always sounded like a real keeper. Certainly not the litany of complaints you are getting right off the bat from this one.

About thirty-five years ago, I read something in Dirt Rider magazine (back when dirt bikes mostly had two shocks and no radiator

)that has stuck with me. It was written about a new motorcycle, but has application to many things and people we find emotionally/sexually/intellectually attractive. It went pretty much like this: "The eyes are organs of great and awesome stupidity; the eyes can fool the brain. The eyes say "that looks good"; the brain says "that is good"."

 

[aaroncort]

Tuberoller, I think you're problem is that you're trying to date really attractive women in thier late 20's/early 30's.All most an really attractive woman in that age group that isn't in a LTR or married is going to have a personality disorder or going to be a run of the mill pain in the ass like your pal Vikki. At that age there are very few reasons why a guy wouldn't have come around at some point and held onto her with both hands. If you can get over it I'd try dating a girl you're not ga-ga over like old Barbra Steisand. Like Seinfeld you''re probably only interested in people who in the end you know it won't work out even if initially you're not aware of it.

 

[Elec]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tuberoller Ok, I know I'm picky and I'm sure most of the women I've met feel I have some serious flaws too but c'mon,who wants to settle for less than what they really want?

That's exactly the problem I have these days. I've already met and been with the girl I wanted to be with forever. The only reason it didn't work out between us is because we were never in the same damn place for very long (a good 2000 miles apart for all of college and now we're both in Washington, though for me it's D.C. and for her it's State).

If you've had it good in the past and know what you want, why would you want to settle for less now? Really makes dating a lot tougher though...