Yeah I agree with you to a point.
I actually did have a pair of Ultrasone's which I sold a while ago which is what got me interested in high end headphones.
I've been a lover of high end audio for a while (previously more so speakers) and can appreciate the Abyss on a certain level (much more than your regular non-audio lovers), but I know what you mean about some people having a lot more experience with their listening. I can't, for example, listen to a pair of headphones, then listen to something else a week later and describe the differences in sound to you - I normally have to do a direct comparison between two or more things at the same time and switch back and forward between them. One thing I noticed about the Abyss is I don't have to do a direct comparison because they are that much better.
I've found since I've owned them that they are probably about as good as you need a pair of headphones to be - there is quite a low percentage of recordings that actually show what they are capable of. I guess we're at a point where they reproduce everything so well, that you have gear that is better than what is in a lot of studios and any imperfections just flow right on through. Having said that, I think there are much less forgiving headphones out there, but I think that this is the point where you don't need anything better because the limiting factor is the recording, not the headphone.
In my opinion they are an especially good choice if you already have a v281, or a Mjolnir like Butler, because you don't need to buy any other gear, just the headphone, where as a 009 (the other popular choice in this price range) really needs a minimum of a $5k electrostat amp which most people don't just have sitting around...