[AmanGeorge]

Very sorry to hear about this, Sir Pepsi. Sometimes life deals some pretty heavy blows, and they never hit harder than when they come from those close to you.

To me, the most important thing is to not lose your sense of self - this is something sh**tty that has happened to you, not a reflection on you. Don't lose sight of that.

Keep your chin up - you'll get through it. You'll be bruised and scarred, but you'll come through - just keep being the person you want to be.

 

[9pintube]

PEPSI, TIME HEALS ALL!! I know that you've heard all the crap lines like that, BUT this will pass.....Say a prayer for "PIECE OF MIND" and "STRENGTH" and remember what George Harrison sang, ALL THINGS MUST PASS! You'll be ok big daddy, you got "US"!

 

[balderon]

Sorry to hear that dude. Everyone has had difficult experiences. One day you will find your Coke a Cola girl and look back and say it was the best thing that happened to me. Be thankful you didn't have any children to suffer through this experience.

 

[chadbang]

Quote:

Originally Posted by thisbenjamin /img/forum/go_quote.gif There is no excuse for a cheating partner. As has been said, be happy it happened now, and not in 10 years when you guys have kids.

Exactly, women come and go, but children are our bridge to immortality. After 8 years my wife left (and I barely miss her) but I fought like a tiger to keep my son (and won). I didn't know what love was until I had my son. Women? Most infatuation, sex and ego. Not real love. Your first child (whenever that happens. It didnt happen to me until I was 44.) will be magical.

 

[KingStyles]

Quote:

I didn't know what love was until I had my son. Women? Most infatuation, sex and ego. Not real love. Your first child (whenever that happens. It didnt happen to me until I was 44.) will be magical.

Totally agree.

 

[Uncle Erik]

Sorry to hear it, man.

First, get the legal stuff going. If your uncle is going to help, put a petition together tonight or tomorrow, then get it filed and served on Monday. Just get the process going - you will feel better.

The second step is to cut her off. That's another good reason to have a lawyer. Force all communications to go through counsel. Be sure to tell her that you're no longer on speaking terms and that you are not going to be friends. Don't take any whining, etc., just tell her no and put a stake in the heart of the relationship. It might sound bad, but you'll start feeling better almost immediately.

Now is the time to take up a new hobby or interest. If DIY interests you, go get a soldering iron. Or take a week in Europe, go on a road trip, learn a new language, get another degree, whatever. You need a big project to work on. If you find yourself dwelling on things, pick up the soldering iron and get busy. It'll keep your mind off things and you'll be happy with what you build, where you go or what you do.

Reconnect with your friends and make new ones. Go hang with the guys. Have a few drinks and have some fun. Don't go overboard or make a mess of things, but going out for a few drinks every night will make you feel better. Becoming a "regular" at a bar is a good thing, too. You will meet more women and you should take one out for a spin. That will help a lot, since you probably feel sort of worthless, unattractive and undesirable right now. So pick someone up at the bar who will make you feel good about yourself, if only for a night or two.

Oh, and if you aren't booked for CanJam, drop everything and make plans. You will have a good time, I promise. I'll pour beer into you and I'm sure quite a few others will, too. There will be lots of people to talk to, food to eat, screwing around, possibly some troublemaking, and so on. So you have to be there.

Anyhow, you will get through this. I'll spare you the horror stories of my ex-fianceé, but you really do get through this crap. I took that relationship out behind the shed and used a blunt instrument on it, much like I recommended above. Right now, I'm happily single and have a lot of fun. I do what I want when I want, go on vacation where I want and there's never a problem if I take home someone from the bar.

Also, if you need support, someone to talk to, or whatever, PM me and I'll send you my number.

 

[Lazarus Short]

Take a long walk tomorrow and think things over.

 

[tomk]

Leave the soldering iron alone; also firearms, explosives and heavy equipment. Old Grand Dad bourbon, Honkers Ale and 50's C & W are your only hope. And do not listen to the Suicide Kings! Great music, bad timing.

 

[virometal]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pepsi /img/forum/go_quote.gif I love Head-Fi, but even my rig can't save me now.

Nothing can really; just going to have to feel it sooner or later. In the meantime, I'd call up my best buds and paint the town a debaucherous color.

Single again for spring time, and the fish are biting!

 

[Hi-Finthen]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jjinh /img/forum/go_quote.gif Man-*hug*

Tough, but, Hang in there, try to think good thoughts, and look forward

 

[11amaberry]

Sorry bro...

 

[Drag0n]

Sorry to hear about the bad news,Pepsi.

Dont take the advice of some that say to go have some beers and go to a bar and meet girls in a bar. The last thing you need is to drink too much and do the wrong thing. Drinking solves nothing. Most bar girls arent worth the price of one drink at a bar, so dont get serious with a bar date.
Seek some good old friends to hang with, and do some BBQs, see some shows, fishing, go to a game, bicycling, go to church, get some new CDs or records, go on a vacation and see the country, or get a hotrod and build an engine.

 

[balderon]

Uncle Erik, you give some of the best advice IMO.

 

[robm321]

I hate hearing things like this. We are definitely here for you.

Your interests will come back. You are going through the healing process which is no fun but necessary. The best thing that you can do is grieve and take care of yourself. Don't pressure, blame or doubt yourself. Eat healthy food and sleep if you can. It is good that it happened early rather than later.

In time, you will be back to normal. Tough it out and try to learn/grow from this. I'll say a prayer for you. Hang in there.

 

[9pintube]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Uncle Erik /img/forum/go_quote.gif Sorry to hear it, man. First, get the legal stuff going. If your uncle is going to help, put a petition together tonight or tomorrow, then get it filed and served on Monday. Just get the process going - you will feel better. The second step is to cut her off. That's another good reason to have a lawyer. Force all communications to go through counsel. Be sure to tell her that you're no longer on speaking terms and that you are not going to be friends. Don't take any whining, etc., just tell her no and put a stake in the heart of the relationship. It might sound bad, but you'll start feeling better almost immediately. Now is the time to take up a new hobby or interest. If DIY interests you, go get a soldering iron. Or take a week in Europe, go on a road trip, learn a new language, get another degree, whatever. You need a big project to work on. If you find yourself dwelling on things, pick up the soldering iron and get busy. It'll keep your mind off things and you'll be happy with what you build, where you go or what you do. Reconnect with your friends and make new ones. Go hang with the guys. Have a few drinks and have some fun. Don't go overboard or make a mess of things, but going out for a few drinks every night will make you feel better. Becoming a "regular" at a bar is a good thing, too. You will meet more women and you should take one out for a spin. That will help a lot, since you probably feel sort of worthless, unattractive and undesirable right now. So pick someone up at the bar who will make you feel good about yourself, if only for a night or two. Oh, and if you aren't booked for CanJam, drop everything and make plans. You will have a good time, I promise. I'll pour beer into you and I'm sure quite a few others will, too. There will be lots of people to talk to, food to eat, screwing around, possibly some troublemaking, and so on. So you have to be there. Anyhow, you will get through this. I'll spare you the horror stories of my ex-fianceé, but you really do get through this crap. I took that relationship out behind the shed and used a blunt instrument on it, much like I recommended above. Right now, I'm happily single and have a lot of fun. I do what I want when I want, go on vacation where I want and there's never a problem if I take home someone from the bar. Also, if you need support, someone to talk to, or whatever, PM me and I'll send you my number.

PEPSI, DO WHAT THIS PRO and FRIEND SAYS, GET IT STARTED YOU WILL FEEL BETTER..Don't give her anymore of your heart, as hard as it is.......peace brother..great advice Uncle EriK (this your field)