Girlfriend Trouble:Need help within 16 hours !
Mar 7, 2006 at 1:50 PM Post #31 of 103
You and your gf are going to have to tell the mother about your relationship or things will just continue to be complicated and there will always be something to be worried about. How long are you expecting to not tell the mother for? your whole life? anyways tell the mom or find a new girl that can tell everyone about your relationship, i bet you would be much happier!
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Mar 7, 2006 at 1:57 PM Post #32 of 103
Quote:

Originally Posted by ]|[ GorE
Now,this girls the best thing to ever happen to me.She brought happiness into my life when i was down academically and mentally.I was really depressed then.I want all of you to know that "NEVER" have i said/done anything bad or even less than chivalrous to her.Everything from holding her bags to opening the door for her.....to being nice to her and praising her looks etc.
I SO SO dont want to loose her.


it's ok to feel this way about a girl, but if you make it obvious and ALWAYS complimeant her and de everything she says, you end up not being happy in the end, these things are good in moderation, besides holding doors, one or 2 compliments a day is good, any more and it looses it's apeal.
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Mar 7, 2006 at 2:15 PM Post #34 of 103
Dude, you need to chill out. I can see that you like her and respect her. But you've got to have some self-respect. A relationship is not one-way traffic. She has to respect you too. If you've admitted your mistake ( which you did, and i don't see the "schedule" thing a big deal, partly because you've not elaborated ), then both of you just need to chill and move on. The only thing you need now is time. Don't force it. Be nice but not obsessive.
 
Mar 7, 2006 at 2:16 PM Post #35 of 103
ok, but you both together, still need to tell the mother. It's the only real way for your relationship to advance. I dated a girl for nearly a year without her mom and her step dad knowing, her real dad knew and was fine with it. One day she called me and said "I told my mom about us." i thought, oh, that really sucks, then she said "she didnt really have any problem with us" it was as easy as that. things were fine.

I'm not saying it will be this easy for you but you need to get it over with
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Mar 7, 2006 at 2:18 PM Post #36 of 103
Quote:

Originally Posted by nabwong
Dude, you need to chill out. I can see that you like her and respect her. But you've got to have some self-respect. A relationship is not one-way traffic. She has to respect you too. If you've admitted your mistake ( which you did, and i don't see the "schedule" thing a big deal, partly because you've not elaborated ), then both of you just need to chill and move on. The only thing you need now is time. Don't force it. Be nice but not obsessive.


yeah, that too.
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Mar 7, 2006 at 2:18 PM Post #37 of 103
Man oh man. I am sorry if I sound insensitive, but this girl sounds like an immature diva. Now, I obviously do not fully understand your relationship, or her family situation, but something is going to have to give. You obviously can not continue to show your feelings for her, and expect them to be kept a secret. If your relationship were to continue, and hopefully grow, the family is going to find out sooner or later.

Anyways, I tried to tell you not to buy flowers, but did you listen?
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Well, I am sorry for the situation you are in now, but it just sounds to me like she has a lot of growing up to do.

Sorry if I have offended you in a any way.
John
 
Mar 7, 2006 at 2:30 PM Post #39 of 103
have you already had the "have a safe flight" conversation? if not then call her and tell her that you "just wanted to say have a safe flight".
If you have, then you should be headed to her friends house
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not really, but you don't need to call again.
 
Mar 7, 2006 at 2:34 PM Post #40 of 103
Another reason for the mess-up.

I went over to the building where she stays and so does our mutual male friend last night because he asked me too.And,I wanting to see her one last time before she leaves for 2/3 months though why not ? Seeing her would be a bonus right ? The reason that made me go is because she had said earlier that she would be completely busy the whole day,today.So that was probably the only chance i had.
So on the phone today,she asked why i had to try and see her the night before.I said that that i thought that was the only chance i had before she left,because she had said that she would be busy today.
She then said that I should have waited for her call today since she's been free since late afternoon.Right.......how am i even supposed to know she's gonna call me ,after she said that she would be busy and wont be able to see me.
Instead,she had asked me to come over to her home before she leaves for the airport.Now think about it: Wont it feel weird to her family if the sons best friend were to show up to say goodbye to his sister/mom(having not done so for the past 3 years) ?
So i had said to her before the quarrel that theres no way i could see her then .
 
Mar 7, 2006 at 2:45 PM Post #41 of 103
Quote:

Originally Posted by ]|[ GorE
Another reason for the mess-up.

I went over to the building where she stays and so does our mutual male friend last night because he asked me too.And,I wanting to see her one last time before she leaves for 2/3 months though why not ? Seeing her would be a bonus right ? The reason that made me go is because she had said earlier that she would be completely busy the whole day,today.So that was probably the only chance i had.
So on the phone today,she asked why i had to try and see her the night before.I said that that i thought that was the only chance i had before she left,because she had said that she would be busy today.
She then said that I should have waited for her call today since she's been free since late afternoon.Right.......how am i even supposed to know she's gonna call me ,after she said that she would be busy and wont be able to see me.
Instead,she had asked me to come over to her home before she leaves for the airport.Now think about it: Wont it feel weird to her family if the sons best friend were to show up to say goodbye to his sister/mom(having not done so for the past 3 years) ?
So i had said to her before the quarrel that theres no way i could see her then .


WHOA WHOA, back this train up! If she is saying things like she is busy all day and then wants to see you right before she goes with everyone around then she is probably going to tell her family about you guys or she is just crazy like my gf. That sounds like a strange situation, how would you really say good bye? you guys can't really be like "oh, i'll miss you sweetheart" hug "see you in a couple months" kiss, with the fam around. how old is this girl? it seems like she doesnt have much experience in these matters.
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Mar 7, 2006 at 2:47 PM Post #42 of 103
Ok dude... I know you're madly in love with this girl and you can't help it.

But, you need to RELAX!

Trust me. These things goes on in the minds of many males when they are inflatuated with a girl. And it can be a detriment.

Step back and look at your thought and actions for a minute. (Actually read this entire thread over and you'll see what I mean) You're running around headless bouncing from one "crisis" to the next.

If you keep making a big deal out of everything, she's gonna start getting annoyed. Worse, she might start thinking poorly of you. And the relationship will go down the hill from there.

Keep calm. It's ok to express your affection for her. But don't overdo it!

Good luck!
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Mar 7, 2006 at 2:52 PM Post #43 of 103
^more good advice^
 
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