Corny Jokes - the more the merrier

[finbad]

What’s red and bad for your teeth?
.
.
.
A brick

I suspect this is stereotypical NYC humor ...lol, tough city humor. lol



"Are you even listening to me?"

Which is a really weird way to start a conversation if you ask me.

So, my wife left me the other day.

Said I didn't listen to her, er, something like that.

 

[Pharmaboy]

My girlfriend told me I'm immature.

Everything she said bounced off me and stuck to her like glue.

 

[BobG55]

A man walks up to a librarian and asks, "Do you have any books on Pavlov's dogs and Schrödinger's cat?"

The librarian responds, "It rings a bell but I'm not sure if it's here or not."

 

[finbad]

A man on vacation with his family arrives at a hotel.

As he's checking in, he says to the clerk,
"I'm on vacation with my family, please make sure the porn channel is disabled"

The clerk replies in disgust, "It's just regular porn, you sick son of a gun"

 

[Pharmaboy]

A man on vacation with his family arrives at a hotel.

As he's checking in, he says to the clerk,
"I'm on vacation with my family, please make sure the porn channel is disabled"

The clerk replies in disgust, "It's just regular porn, you sick son of a gun"

OK--that is funny!

 

[finbad]

Or the other way around.

Man arrives to the hotel with his wife and kids waiting in the lobby, the clerk asks,
"would you like the porn channel on your room to be disabled, sir?"

To which the man replies in disgust, "No, just normal porn, you sick so-n-so." lol

 

[Pharmaboy]

Or the other way around.

Man arrives to the hotel with his wife and kids waiting in the lobby, the clerk asks,
"would you like the porn channel on your room to be disabled, sir?"

To which the man replies in disgust, "No, just normal porn, you sick so-n-so." lol

For some reason this joke is reminding me of my nephew's astounding & unexpected rant about how "4K video ruined porn for me."

I'm not a fan of porn, yet impulsively asked the logical follow-up: "What do you mean" (and will never stop remembering the answer).

 

[finbad]

How many Irishmen does it take to change a light bulb?

Ten.

The plan is one to hold the bulb and nine to drink 'til the room spins.