[LawnGnome]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ken36 /img/forum/go_quote.gif I would be wary of having relationship with someone seeing a therapist. Maybe $200.00 was a bargain.

That is a pretty warped way of looking at it.

Going to a therapist and dealing with one's issues is better than repressing them and denying them like most people do.

Plus, you don't even know why she is seeing one, maybe it is because of a death in her close family?

Either way, that is a pretty ignorant remark on your behalf.

 

[AuroraProject]

I could never consider a gift as a loss. I gave my girlfriend a $5000 engagement ring 10 years ago, now I'm divorced. I don't consider it to be a $5k loss though.

 

[Walie]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ENT /img/forum/go_quote.gif Pssh.. I really don't think she should be a biochem major if she needs a therapist to handle the coursework.. yes it is hard - so study.

+100

I had an ex who over-studied for everything and took out her resulting "stress" on everyone around her. Attempts to optimize her study habits were futile.

 

[uraflit]

was she sad/guilty on the break up? did she willingly or unwillingly accept the gift?

and i have to agree with the others about the major issue... i am a biological science (almost the same as biochem) AND psychology major, busy with fraternity/multiple clubs/committee chair responsibilities, a job, and a girlfriend too. also in process of debating between medical school or grad school with only a month or two left to decide.

i aint complaining =D

 

[omegaman]

Quote:

Originally Posted by immtbiker /img/forum/go_quote.gif You gave it to her because you cared about her, and still do. So that wasn't a mistake. Now, her taking it, that's a different story .

x2, I can't believe she accepted the gift.

 

[blessingx]

I'm always amazed by the kindness and generosity of Head-Fiers... except when discussing relationships.

 

[ericj]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LawnGnome /img/forum/go_quote.gif That is a pretty warped way of looking at it. Going to a therapist and dealing with one's issues is better than repressing them and denying them like most people do.

Speaking from experience, though, if someone dumps you strictly because their therapist suggested it, you're better off without them.

 

[LawnGnome]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ericj /img/forum/go_quote.gif Speaking from experience, though, if someone dumps you strictly because their therapist suggested it, you're better off without them.

In a way, yes and no.

Yes because they do not have the will to stay with you, despite what people say.

And

No, because when a person's life gets out of control, a person puts their trust in therapist, and that they know what is best.


However, we still don't know if the therapist told her not to be with him, or not be in a relationship in general.

 

[bowraboy]

I would have given the iPod to the therapist.

 

[cvc]

Man, nice parting gift. Here's my advice. "Don't be a SUCKER!"

 

[Zayeem]

Well, It's not a bad thing to have given it to her. Giving is never a bad thing, especially to someone you love. I would have still given it to her.

The real problem here is that your ex is hiding behind her therapist.

 

[ericj]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LawnGnome /img/forum/go_quote.gif In a way, yes and no. Yes because they do not have the will to stay with you, despite what people say. And No, because when a person's life gets out of control, a person puts their trust in therapist, and that they know what is best.

Therapists are just people. Sometimes they're full of crap.

 

[Zarathustra19]

for the most part, people seeing therapists don't need therapy, they need to suck it up and get over their little problems. Yes, there are plenty of people out there that actually need help (REAL depression, suicidal thoughts, cutting, schizophrenia, etc) but unfortunately a lot of people use therapy as an excuse not to deal with their own life. Its too bad, and I'm sure I'll be flamed repeatedly for saying so.

P.S. for anyone who actually went through depression or any of the things I said and got help, I'm glad you did, and I'm not trying to belittle the problems a lot of people have, but anti-depressants are prescribed far too often for things that are certainly not depression.

 

[uraflit]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zarathustra19 /img/forum/go_quote.gif for the most part, people seeing therapists don't need therapy, they need to suck it up and get over their little problems. Yes, there are plenty of people out there that actually need help (REAL depression, suicidal thoughts, cutting, schizophrenia, etc) but unfortunately a lot of people use therapy as an excuse not to deal with their own life. Its too bad, and I'm sure I'll be flamed repeatedly for saying so. P.S. for anyone who actually went through depression or any of the things I said and got help, I'm glad you did, and I'm not trying to belittle the problems a lot of people have, but anti-depressants are prescribed far too often for things that are certainly not depression.

you are such an ignorant piece of.... just kidding

if therapists "fixed" problems on the spot, how would they keep earning a living?

amen on the over prescriptions too.

OP: you should try and contact the therapist... with the ex-gf's consent =D

 

[ericj]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Zarathustra19 /img/forum/go_quote.gif for the most part, people seeing therapists don't need therapy, they need to suck it up and get over their little problems. Yes, there are plenty of people out there that actually need help (REAL depression, suicidal thoughts, cutting, schizophrenia, etc) but unfortunately a lot of people use therapy as an excuse not to deal with their own life. Its too bad, and I'm sure I'll be flamed repeatedly for saying so.

It's not that, some people do really need an uninvolved party to talk to.

But putting too much stock in every single thing your therapist says is problematic - five different therapists would probably give you at least three different answers for any given problem.

Not to mention the whole issue of honesty - what if you're saying just what you want to hear yourself say and your therapist is too dim to see through it?

I've been dumped out of a long-term relationship due to the suggestion of people who didn't have the whole story. My sister was dumped out of one because her boyfriend basically did every single thing his therapist suggested might be a good idea for him to do, and suggested he should break up with my sister.

In either case - stupid? Yes. Did it suck? Yes. Was it actually necessary to break up? No. But was the therapist-cowtowing SO actually capable of having an honest & healthy relationship? Not a chance!