[fenixdown110]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttvetjanu /img/forum/go_quote.gif Depends entirely on what OP is looking for in a girl. I am personally not interested in relationships (due to my current life situation my future is rather unclear), but I do pick up girls from bars/clubs once in a while. Confidence is most important. I would not recommend staring at girls as this generally makes you look like a stalker. Everyone has their only style, to try to adapt someone else's would feel strange. What I tend to do is make eye contact and smile or sometimes smile and wink at the girl I am interested in. I have also "proposed toasts" from long distances (lifted my glass). If I get any positive reactions, for example a blush, smiling back or a returned toast I will probably go talk with her later. Not straight away, but for example if my friend is getting a drink or going to the toilet. It would be too intimidating just to stand up and start walking towards her while she is looking. I like to ask rather random, sometimes even offensive questions. Girls don't really expect that. If they look too shocked I'll just laugh and say it was a joke and "how are you?". If they respond to the question I have already started an interesting conversation. Being well-groomed is not really that necessary (at least not considering facial hair), girls (at least here in Finland) seem to like a manly looking guy, and a little beard never hurts. Besides if you are always cleanly shaved with perfect hair and a neat ironed shirt it might seem like you are trying a bit too hard. This though depends on the age-group in question. Personally I am 21. Good luck OP.

I'm not sure which relationship the OP is looking for as well. What you described is how to pick up a one night stand. The one I described for a serious relationship. I guess he can pick between the two to fit his needs. I personally can't go through with a one night stand. It just goes against my morals. But there are girls that like one night stands too. Who am I to judge, right? Good luck OP with whichever you choose.

 

[Ttvetjanu]

Quote:

Originally Posted by fenixdown110 /img/forum/go_quote.gif I'm not sure which relationship the OP is looking for as well. What you described is how to pick up a one night stand. The one I described for a serious relationship. I guess he can pick between the two to fit his needs. I personally can't go through with a one night stand. It just goes against my morals. But there are girls that like one night stands too. Who am I to judge, right? Good luck OP with whichever you choose.

everyone in their own way

we're all here just to have fun after all!

 

[fenixdown110]

That's right. Make love, not war.

 

[AmanGeorge]

One of my best friends in high school went through a bad breakup, and afterwards immersed himself in reading about dating theory, and we ended up having some really interesting conversations on the subject. So, prepare for a bit of a screed that I hope will be a helpful one.

The good news is: you don't have to be an Abercrombie and Fitch model to be successful with women. Physical looks play less of a role in attraction for women than they do for men. The bad news is: moms spend most of your life screwing you over by giving you bad advice about how the fairer sex works.

I think the first key thing to internalize is that women are biologically wired to seek out the most "worthy" male counterpart, in terms of strength, social status, intelligence, etc. What this means for men is that signs of weakness or desperation are an immediate turn-off. An attractive woman has hundreds of interactions a day in which a man, thinking "wow, she's cute, I should be nice to her" does something extra nice for her, gives her a little extra attention, opens the door for her, offers to carry her stuff, etc. If you think that this is the key to an attractive woman's heart, you're wrong - this type of behavior is the norm, and doing it makes you boring - you're one of the masses who puts her on a pedestal.

Instead of treating a woman you're attracted to as a queen, try turning the tables on her. I don't mean this to sound demeaning, but it's a mindset thing - she should be trying to get to know you, not the other way around. What this means for your first interaction with a girl is that you shouldn't just ask her some sort of boring question to "break the ice". Again, countless guys do this same thing to her every day - it's boring. Let any interaction with her happen naturally, and when it happens, make it clear that you are the one that needs to be impressed by her, not that you're desperate to impress her. Be playful, make fun of her, don't ever be self-deprecating, be willing to cut conversations short and go talk to someone else, don't try and buy her drinks to get her to like you... she needs to get a signal that you're interesting, fun, confident, in charge, and not focusing on trying to win her approval.

One of the key phrases my friend used to use was that "attraction is not a choice." A woman either does or doesn't feel attraction within the first minute of meeting a man based on the interactions they have and the "feeling" that they get from the guy. If you blow the first impression by being boring or weak, you're pretty much done with this girl. You cannot "convince" her that you're worthy of her time through logical arguments about how smart you are, how much nicer you would be than all those other jerks she dates, how thoughtful or caring you would be, etc.... girls don't make a logical decision about whether or not they like you, because attraction isn't a logical thing - it's a gut reaction that somebody has instantly.

Hope this is a helpful start - good luck!

 

[AmanGeorge]

Oh, regarding looks/grooming - although I said girls care less about physical attractiveness than men, it obviously never hurts to look your best. Staying well-groomed and making sure you're well-dressed can usually only help your cause - I wouldn't disregard it.

 

[Nocturnal310]

believe it or not...

i actually used my headphone amp as a prop to open a chinese girl in college..got her number and met her...but her english was awesomely terrible so couldnt do much.


i asked her an opinion 'does this thing look like a bomb?'

 

[LeftyGorilla]

Best relationship advice I ever got from a woman was:

"If a woman wants to have sex with you there is no way you can stop her."

Took me about 3 years to figure it out.

 

[krmathis]

Carefully, cause they may bite.

Seriously, just be yourself. A clean an proper dressed one that is... Observe, friendly approach, then take it from there.

 

[Nocturnal310]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LeftyGorilla /img/forum/go_quote.gif Best relationship advice I ever got from a woman was: "If a woman wants to have sex with you there is no way you can stop her." Took me about 3 years to figure it out.

thats one quote with lot of wisdom behind it.

she ll also make it lot easier for u.

but remember..u r the man and u ll have to lead her.

 

[Lazarus Short]

Don't forget the usefulness of that most basic pick-up line:

"Just get in the car, OK?"

 

[Ttvetjanu]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lazarus Short /img/forum/go_quote.gif Don't forget the usefulness of that most basic pick-up line: "Just get in the car, OK?"

One of the best one's I've heard is "You know, this doesn't have to be a rape..."

 

[AmanGeorge]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttvetjanu /img/forum/go_quote.gif One of the best one's I've heard is "You know, this doesn't have to be a rape..."

________Line---> | ________Ttvetjanu----->

 

[LeftyGorilla]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttvetjanu /img/forum/go_quote.gif One of the best one's I've heard is "You know, this doesn't have to be a rape..."

Yeah, this is not cool on any level. Totally out of line, not funny, and not acceptable.

Real men really have to stand up and not allow this sort of mentality to go unchallenged.

You know why some women are hard to approach? Because they have to deal with douchebags who think like that. Make women feel safe in your communities and everyone can live more freely.

 

[El_Doug]

+ YouTube Video​

ERROR: If you can see this, then YouTube is down or you don't have Flash installed.

 

[wantmyf1]

AmanGeorge's advice sounds very similar to what you'll find in this book "The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pick-up Artists". It's by Neil Strauss. Personally I think that many of the techniques in this book are insulting and blatantly manipulative. BTW, I don't mean to insult AmanGeorge or suggest that he's used any of the more questionable techniques in the book, just that his suggestion sound similar to one of the tamer techniques suggested.

Keep in mind that I'm not recommending this book as a way to find a fulfilling, lasting relationship. But it is an interesting analysis of human relationships and female psychology.