[Luvya]

UPDATE!
New "revised" resume is posted a few responses below! Let me know what you guys think of the new one. Thanks!

btw, make sure my grammar and punctuation are correct. I am horrible at them

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last month, I had you guys critique my cover letter and I got great suggestions

But cover letter is just cover letter, the meat is in the resume. So please critique away, let me know what you think of it!

My Name
6816 XXXXXX Ave., XXXX, CA XXXXX
Tel: (XXX) XXX-XXXX Email: XXXXX@XXXXX.com

EDUCATION

2005 M.B.A. Loyola Marymount University
·Member of the $200,000 student investment fund
·Emphasis in finance

2001B.A. University of California, Riverside
·Economics/Administrative Studies major
·Dean’s list, Winter 2001

PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE

Sept 05-Present Project Associate The California Credits Group, Pasadena, CA
· Awarded the prize for accuracy in marketing and research.
· Facilitated marketing supports for the business development directors by identifying potential clients and creating marketing packets.
· Visited client sites to obtain documentations and evaluate first-hand information.
· Conducted file reviews to qualify clients for Enterprise Zone tax credits.
· Investigated any discrepancy resulted from file reviews by interviewing clients about their background and income history.
· Implemented payroll and tax credit information and deducted from clients’ taxable income using Superform.


Jan 02-May 02 Accounting Assistant SES International Express, Inglewood, CA
· Promoted quality customer services by collaborating with sales and warehouse units.
· Maintained up-to-date information on client accounts by actively monitoring and updating them.
· Implemented basic accounting functions, such as, account receivable, journal entries and account reconciliation.

ADDITIONAL

Spring 02 Volunteer Income Tax Assistant (VITA)
· Participated in a 6-weeks training to help preparing tax returns for low income household and elderly.
· Assisted in filing tax return electronically (Using e-file).


Computer Skills: Windows, Mac OS, MS Word, Excel, PowerPoint, Access, Superform

Languages: Mandarin, Taiwanese (Native), English (Fluent), and French (Good)

 

[JahJahBinks]

I immediately notice that your resume lacks an objective.

 

[Thaddy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by JahJahBinks I immediately notice that your resume lacks an objective.

Yup, first thing I noticed as well. Also, you might want to note which computer skills you are proficient in, and which ones you're familiar with.

 

[mrarroyo]

Try to put the items in what you accomplished better or more effectively. Prospective employers want to see what you can do if they hire you. It is also a good idea to quantifiy the accomplishment.

 

[jpelg]

Quote:

Originally Posted by JahJahBinks I immediately notice that your resume lacks an objective.

You don't need an "objective" listed on your resume. The objective is to get the job you are applying for. Quote:

Originally Posted by mrarroyo Try to put the items in what you accomplished better or more effectively. Prospective employers want to see what you can do if they hire you. It is also a good idea to quantifiy the accomplishment.

I agree. I would describe, in brief, the general nature/requirements of the jobs you've held. Then list specific accomplishments, backed up with quantifyable info.

 

[JahJahBinks]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jpelg You don't need an "objective" listed on your resume. The objective is to get the job you are applying for.

Could you tell me what kind of job he is looking for?

 

[jpelg]

Quote:

Originally Posted by JahJahBinks Could you tell me what kind of job he is looking for?

That, as well as a brief description how his experience can be applied to the desired position & make him the best candidate, should be written in a customized cover letter accompanying each application. Not on the resume.

 

[hongda]

That depends on where the resume is going. I put an objective on my resumes because they go into resume databases. Most large scale companies take your resume and scan them in into a database. When a job opening occurs, the hiring manager can do a search through the database to find qualified applicants. At least that's my experience in engineering.

 

[Thaddy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jpelg That, as well as a brief description how his experience can be applied to the desired position & make him the best candidate, should be written in a customized cover letter accompanying each application. Not on the resume.

I disagree. It can't hurt to put a quick objective statement on the resume, at the very top. I've fresh out of college and have had resume-etiquette jammed down my throat for the past four years, and have heard from professors, career services employees, and even human resource representatives from many companies than an objective statement is a nice thing to have, and really gives your resume a reason for being. For example, here is mine:

Quote:

OBJECTIVE: • Seeking employment in the information technology field to complement my education and experience.

It surely won't hurt!

edit: I'd also like to add that the company that hired me actually commented on how nice my resume looked

[size=xx-small]Ok, I'm done bragging now![/size]

 

[JahJahBinks]

You don't want to leave the guessing work to the hiring manager. Since he has a MBA, he maybe be looking for a management position, or he maybe be looking for a non-management position.

 

[Illah]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Luvya last month, I had you guys critique my cover letter and I got great suggestions But cover letter is just cover letter, the meat is in the resume. So please critique away, let me know what you think of it!

The cover letter is *more* important in my opinoin. Without a good cover letter your resume won't be read

It shows your writing skills, communication skills, personality, etc. It should be customized to each employer. Also, customize your resume to each employer to some degree. Don't just lock it in stone and send it out as-is all the time, highlight what they are looking for and remove irrelevant info by rearranging your bullet points, adding/removing bullets, etc.

As for the resume, it's sort of a 'laundry list' as it stands right now. Try to stick more to achievements. 'The prize' for accuracy is good, but try and specify what 'the prize' was. Is there a name for it within the organization? It could simply be a pat on the back from your boss the way it's written now, but if you were awarded the "John Smith Accuracy Prize" it sounds more official.

And rather than an 'objective', I like a 'Summary of Qualifications'. As someone mentioned above, everyone's objective is the same...to get the job! Here's my summary to give you an idea:

"A fast learner with proven strengths in video, multimedia, technology and project management in both a fast paced Internet start-up environment and the advertising industry. Skilled in managing multiple projects simultaneously while consistently meeting deadlines. Highly creative individual with considerable training in art and design. Able to develop, execute, and deliver quality work on or ahead of schedule."

Also education should be placed lower. Unless it's Harvard, your real world experience will be more valuable to a future employer. At the top you can put, "John Smith, MBA" to signify you have an MBA since that's a good selling point. You can also drop a line that alludes to your MBA in your cover letter, something like, "While interning at XYZ corp while pursuing my MBA at Loyola Maramount..."

Other than that flesh out the resume a bit more so they have more context around what you've done. Not everyone has heard of every company, so showcasing that can help. Here's an example that might help:

Quote:

JWT Specialized Communications, San Francisco, CA Search Engine Marketing Project Manager - 2004-present JWT Specialized Communications, a subsidiary of JWT, the largest advertising agency in America, provides cutting edge solutions to clients in specialized fields such as Search Engine Marketing and Blogs. · Active participant in new business initiatives. Presented capabilities and trained JWT offices nationwide. Winner of 2004 ‘Flying Colors’ new business award. · Manage organic search engine optimization (SEO) programs for clients such as Ford Motor Co., Lincoln/Mercury, Diageo, and the Military Officers Association of America. · Manage Pay-Per-Click campaigns (PPC/SEM) for clients such as Boeing, Intel, and Starbucks. · Expert in developing corporate Blog strategies and polices. Authored JWT SC/JWT EC corporate blogging policy. Published author in December 2005 IHRIM Journal, an international human resources trade publication.

Not to say that's the best resume in the world or anything, but it gives a little description about the job and the company. The bullets are more achievement oriented, with some description around what was done. And yes, there's name dropping with the client list, but when experience with blue-chip companies counts, it doesn't hurt.

--Illah

 

[Uncle Erik]

I've always thrown a personal thing or two on at the bottom.

Well, nothing *that* personal. Avoid the usual controversial stuff: politics, sex, religion, cables/DBT, etc. But if you do something like give lessons at the local golf course, you should absolutely have that on there.

Why? First of all, if you're in an interview, they're already decided that you have the basic qualifications for the job. They're looking to see how personable you are and whether or not they'll get along with you. With something like this, the worst that can happen is that the interviewer will not care. On the other hand, if the interviewer is a golfer, you've got something to talk about. I've done this and ended up spending the interview talking about this stuff instead. And got the job.

And if you don't have an interesting tidbit to put at the bottom, give yourself one. Volunteer a few hours a week at an animal sheter, school or library. Take up a hobby or a sport, and put that on there. It'll either not hurt your application, or it will put you ahead of everyone else. It works.

 

[crazyfrenchman27]

You want an objective for your resume, regardless of what you are applying for.

-Matt

 

[Luvya]

Ok, here is the latest incarnation of my resume. It's not going to be a crowd pleaser since I haven't add an objective to it. (Yes, I know I know) Just too many resume books I've read suggest NOT to put an objective in the resume.

Here are the changes I've made:
1. Add description of the companies.
2. Replace/eliminate some of the bullet points. Instead of pumping up the prize (it's a weekly thing anyway), I replace it with being part of the team that generated $24M in tax credits. I think this will appeal to more recruiters.
3. Fiddle with the "Additional" section to make it more personal. I have trouble indicating headphone is my hobby

Guys, help me out here

My Name
My address
Tel: XXX-XXX-XXXX Email: XXXXX@XXXXX.com

EDUCATION

2005 M.B.A. Loyola Marymount University
·Member of the $200,000 student investment fund
·Emphasis in finance
2001B.A. University of California, Riverside
·Economics/Administrative Studies major
·Dean’s list, Winter 2001

PROFESSIONAL EXPERIENCE

Sept 05-Present Project Associate The California Credits Group, Pasadena, CA
CCG is the largest tax consulting firm in the nation with a primary focus on Enterprise Zone Credits. Clients base ranges from mid-size to fortune 500.

·Part of team that generated $24M in tax credits for one of our clients.
·Facilitated marketing supports for the business development directors by identifying potential clients and creating marketing packets.
·Conducted file reviews to qualify clients for Enterprise Zone tax credits.
·Investigated any discrepancy resulted from file reviews by interviewing clients about their background and income history.
·Implemented payroll and tax credit information and deducted from clients’ taxable income using Superform.

Jan 02-May 02 Accounting Assistant SES International Express, Inglewood, CA
S.E.S. International Express, Inc. is a full-service global forwarding enterprise that reaches more than 50 major cities in 27 countries.

·Promoted quality customer services by collaborating with sales and warehouse units.
·Maintained up-to-date information on client accounts by actively monitoring and updating them.
·Implemented basic accounting functions, such as, account receivable, journal entries and account reconciliation.

ADDITIONAL

Volunteer Income Tax Assistance Assistant (VITA) Spring, 2002
Member of UCR and LMU Alumni Association
Interests: Table Tennis, (silver medallist twice) classical music, headphones.
Computer Skills: Windows, Mac OS, MS Word, Excel, PowerPoint, Access, Superform
Languages: Mandarin, Taiwanese (Native), English (Fluent), and French (Good)

 

[jpelg]

1. Don't describe the companies under your job titles. Leave that for the interview. Use your resume to showcase YOU. Give the job title & a brief description of the job. Then bullet-point some specific accomplishments you did at each position. Hiring managers want to know what you can DO. Don't make them work too hard finding that out on the resume.

2. Change "Professional Experience" to simply "Experience". Then move the fact that you were a member of the student investment fund, and list that as your first job, and explain what you did to help manage the fund.

3. Don't bury your computer or language skills with your other activities/interests. Showcase them separately, and higher up on the page. The fact that you can speak several languages is FAR more important than that you play table-tennis. Put "Other Interests" at the end. This is often used for ending the interview by talking about something personal outside of your professional life.

Again, don't make it difficult for potential employers to find out the really relevant information. Your resume will, in all likelyhood, be going through a Human Resources screening process before it gets to the hiring manager in a specific department. Then when it gets to the department manager, s/he will probably have many, many resumes to look thru, and people to interview. This is a hinderance to their regular workday - trust me. Make it as easy as possible for them to understand what you can DO. Make it detailed enough for them to understand where you've been, but leave some specifics for the interview so you have something to say.