[Pharmaboy]

You know your old when your wife says “Let’s go upstairs & make love” & you reply “choose one, I can’t do both”.

(which gets riser out of her)

 

[LostHisMarbles]

During the COVID craze am on the phone with a friend, eventually am telling him about my love.
He asks if she's alright, i tell him sure, she's had her shots and everything.
He meant the missus, i meant the dog, but conversation carries on just fine, lol.

* i tend to sleep on the couch often.

 

[The Jester]

You know your old when your wife says “Let’s go upstairs & make love” & you reply “choose one, I can’t do both”.

Even worse when you need 3 days notice ..

 

[The Jester]

During the COVID craze am on the phone with a friend, eventually am telling him about my love.
He asks if she's alright, i tell him sure, she's had her shots and everything.
He meant the missus, i meant the dog, but conversation carries on just fine, lol.

* i tend to sleep on the couch often.

You let the dog on the couch ? …

 

[The Jester]

Like the two guys in the pub,
One guy has his dog lying quietly under the table when all of a sudden it lifts a hind leg and starts liking its balls,
Guy laughs and says “I wish I could do that”
Owner replies “best you Pat him first “ …

 

[JeffB1961]

what do i have if i have a deer with no eyes ??




i have no idea

 

[paulrbarnard]

what do i have if i have a deer with no eyes ??




i have no idea

What if it loses its legs?



Still no idea

 

[The Jester]

What do you call a deer with no ears ?
Doesn’t matter, it can’t hear you ..

 

[JeffB1961]

I have no eye deer

 

[LoryWiv]

What do you call a fish with no eyes?

Fsh

 

[BobG55]

What do you get if you cross an elephant with a rhino ?

Elephino.

 

[DenverW]

Because you always get the punchline before the joke.

 

[DenverW]

Why are jokes about time travel so bad?

 

[BobG55]

 

[Robert1954]

slide rule?

electronic calculator, or a spreadsheet