[Ciggavelli]

I believe you are confusing being critical with being negative. Being critical means you are good at any job. You don’t slack off. It’s a personal philosophy.

Being negative is an emotional state of mind that clouds your judgment and ruins your life. And like any state of mind it changes constantly so you can never be satisfied.

The best way to change is to first identify and recognize your weakness and strengths. Fix the weakness and bolster your strength. You should know how it goes since you do it everyday at work.

Example: look at John Wick. The dude isn’t a murder hobo psychopath. He’s just very focused and mission driven but his job ended up being assassin. Your job doesn’t define you. So your “negativity” isn’t necessary for the job. It’s more likely being around a negative environment made you more miserable.

That's a good way of looking at it! I can be critical, but also be positive at the same time. Being critical is a negative in my eyes, but I guess it doesn't have to be

I feel that being critical is a good life skill to have. It makes me a better worker, a better audiophile, a better self. That distinction between critical and negativity is interesting. I've never thought about it that way. Thanks!

I've been listening to some more positive, negative music. Maybe that will help.

 

[Whazzzup]

Take baby steps with reggae as an end goal….way down the line

 

[Ciggavelli]

I'm thinking of possibly going the speaker route, which is the logical next step. I've been listening to my modest K50s and they just sound good and give me what I want. Maybe speakers are the answer. I just need some good bookshelves. Speakers are different than headphones, and both have their pros and cons, but I think speakers might be the answer. It's what summit-fi graduates to.

 

[psy472]

I'm thinking of possibly going the speaker route, which is the logical next step. I've been listening to my modest K50s and they just sound good and give me what I want. Maybe speakers are the answer. I just need some good bookshelves. Speakers are different than headphones, and both have their pros and cons, but I think speakers might be the answer. It's what summit-fi graduates to.

So what’s next? Take off from the summit and go Sky-fi?

 

[Ciggavelli]

So what’s next? Take off from the summit and go Sky-fi?

The speaker world is new to me. It can get crazy expensive, but I think I could get some good bookshelves for around $12k. If I get efficient ones, I could just drive them off my modded mDAVE. The bass and soundstage is just better with speakers, and I only have K50s and some B&O Besound speakers. Some real speakers could be amazing. I just need to move the setup to my room, instead of my office, so as not to disturb others (I have thick walls). Hearing sound and being able to move around to it is awesome. I don't have to be in one position. I can sleep to it. I can laydown to it. I can dance to it. Speakers are just next level. I dunno if I'm ready, but I'm close

 

[psy472]

The speaker world is new to me. It can get crazy expensive, but I think I could get some good bookshelves for around $12k. If I get efficient ones, I could just drive them off my modded mDAVE. The bass and soundstage is just better with speakers, and I only have K50s and some B&O Besound speakers. Some real speakers could be amazing. I just need to move the setup to my room, instead of my office, so as not to disturb others (I have thick walls). Hearing sound and being able to move around to it is awesome. I don't have to be in one position. I can sleep to it. I can laydown to it. I can dance to it. Speakers are just next level. I dunno if I'm ready, but I'm close

I know how it feels. I have a 7.1 surround setup from Sonos. That’s all I need for speakers. The sound is ethereal with this system like you’re just inside it.

You should update to speakers if you want to feel the sound through your body. My Sonos systems is good but it’s not super expensive nor does it do what the expensive ones can do.

You want that super expensive speakers if you want the sound vibration to vibrate the body (a texture to the sound) like you are swimming in it much like in huge concerts.

I went to opposite since I can’t afford those speakers, I got headphones that can at least have my ears feel that texture of sound.

 

[BassicScience]

The speaker world is new to me. It can get crazy expensive, but I think I could get some good bookshelves for around $12k. If I get efficient ones, I could just drive them off my modded mDAVE. The bass and soundstage is just better with speakers, and I only have K50s and some B&O Besound speakers. Some real speakers could be amazing. I just need to move the setup to my room, instead of my office, so as not to disturb others (I have thick walls). Hearing sound and being able to move around to it is awesome. I don't have to be in one position. I can sleep to it. I can laydown to it. I can dance to it. Speakers are just next level. I dunno if I'm ready, but I'm close

Given your love of bass, I'd recommend floor-standers over bookshelf speakers... else you'll probably want to add a subwoofer or two, which takes up even more space. Also, if you plan to move around the room a lot, prioritize speakers with wide dispersion. Unless you want horns or powered speakers, you're not going to be satisfied without a proper amp (see previous comment about your love of bass ). Honestly, there are a lot of great speakers at or under $12k these days, and powerful, SOTA amplifiers (Hypex/Purifi class D) are also available at very reasonable prices. Plus you can possibly use your Woo as a preamp, at least to start. It'll probably be a much smaller investment than your headphones, in part because you won't be tempted to own a handful of speakers... or so I'd guess!

 

[Ciggavelli]

Given your love of bass, I'd recommend floor-standers over bookshelf speakers... else you'll probably want to add a subwoofer or two, which takes up even more space. Also, if you plan to move around the room a lot, prioritize speakers with wide dispersion. Unless you want horns or powered speakers, you're not going to be satisfied without a proper amp (see previous comment about your love of bass ). Honestly, there are a lot of great speakers at or under $12k these days, and powerful, SOTA amplifiers (Hypex/Purifi class D) are also available at very reasonable prices. Plus you can possibly use your Woo as a preamp, at least to start. It'll probably be a much smaller investment than your headphones, in part because you won't be tempted to own a handful of speakers... or so I'd guess!

Yeah, good advice. I'd keep the TCs and the Sus with the CFA3 for when I want headphones, and use the WA33 EE JPS money on speakers. I've been listening to the CFA3 exclusively for a few days now. It's not bad at all. I'm using my WA33 as a pre, but I bet a better pre would be even better. I just need something "else" now. Speakers seem like the next logical step. I just need to make sure I'm always in a well isolated room. I don't want to disturb others. That's what always kept me away from speakers, but my walls are very thick and my K50s and B&Os don't leak outta my room. A sub might, but I'd keep it low.

 

[Karnicopia]

Yeah, I might need to just bite the bullet and do the 3 month thing again. We'll see how tomorrow goes. My problem is I'm a thinker and a negative one at that. All I can see are the negatives. It makes me great at my job (luckily I found a job were being super negative is seen as a positive. UX Research). But always thinking is a bad thing. Like I discovered the secrets of the universe, but once you learn that sh!t it just leads to nihilism. I drink and I think less. I'm more fun and spontaneous. It takes away that layer of anxiety. But, it's not a viable long term solution. I realize that; I just wonder if there is another solution. I don't know if there is. I did the completely sober life for 5 years. I was miserable. I don't know if sobriety is the answer. I'm in a bad space, honestly. I don't know what to do.

I just wanted to say that meditation really helps with this over thinking. It's almost like our brain just builds up a backlog of broken thoughts throughout the day (or even weeks and months) and they build up and build up and when you meditate it's kind of like clearing all of that crap out.

Basically all of it is, you sit somewhere quietly close your eyes and relax and you don't try not to think you just sit there and let your thoughts wander and after a certain amount of time your brain starts to run out of things to think of and there is a sense of calm and quiet. This can take a number of days so if I don't meditate for a while I may not really get to a sense of calm and quiet but each time I get closer and then the more consistently I'm doing it the easier it is. I try and do 20 min in the morning and 20 min at night but it can be hard to keep up with it but I just do it when I can. That does seem like a lot of time but it's relaxing time so I don't ever really regret it sometimes it's just tough to get that time in. Also there are a lot of different kinds of meditation but this was just the one that I learned and I think if you can do 10 min consistently that may be better than 20 min sporadically.

 

[psy472]

I just wanted to say that meditation really helps with this over thinking. It's almost like our brain just builds up a backlog of broken thoughts throughout the day (or even weeks and months) and they build up and build up and when you meditate it's kind of like clearing all of that crap out.

Basically all of it is, you sit somewhere quietly close your eyes and relax and you don't try not to think you just sit there and let your thoughts wander and after a certain amount of time your brain starts to run out of things to think of and there is a sense of calm and quiet. This can take a number of days so if I don't meditate for a while I may not really get to a sense of calm and quiet but each time I get closer and then the more consistently I'm doing it the easier it is. I try and do 20 min in the morning and 20 min at night but it can be hard to keep up with it but I just do it when I can. That does seem like a lot of time but it's relaxing time so I don't ever really regret it sometimes it's just tough to get that time in. Also there are a lot of different kinds of meditation but this was just the one that I learned and I think if you can do 10 min consistently that may be better than 20 min sporadically.

I do a version of meditation too, but unlike you I can’t sit still for long or stay quiet either… So I learned a form of active meditation that way I can meditate on the move. I do a 15-20 minutes of dedicated meditation every morning. The day doesn’t feel right without it.

 

[Ciggavelli]

I like meditation, but it is often hard for me because I'm a thinker. I need to give it another go though. It could help. I did yoga a couple of times in rehab back in the day. It was pretty cool actually. Maybe I'll get into that more. I need something. I prefer something mind-altering, but that might just be my addiction talking to me. I hate life unadulterated. It is what it is. There's got to be a solution out there that won't kill me or leave me in jail. Alcohol works to some degree, but of course I overdo it given my personality. It's a tough situation.

I went to a rehab place and told them I was miserable sober, but I'm also not good drunk. They had no good answer. I'm in a tough spot. Live life sober and hate life, live life drunk and get addicted and ruin my life. I don't know what the right answer is. I guess the smart decision is to be sober, but life was so miserable sober. It was terrible. I was just waiting to die. I don't want that again. I also don't wanna have the alcoholic consequences either. I'm in a tough spot. Moderation seems like the best answer, but it might not be possible given my personality. I wish it was. I hate AA. I'm not doing that sh!t. I don't want to talk to a bunch of drunks about being drunk. Sh!t makes no sense to me. The rehab place today told me I had to get new friends and a new girlfriend. I don't wanna do that sh!t at all. At 41 it's hard to make new friends and it's hard to meet a good woman. Fukc that sh!t. They had no good answers. My psychiatrist was calling me all day. I ignored that sh!t because I knew it was about me being "difficult" at the rehab place. I'll talk to him tomorrow. There really is no solution. If money is the answer, then sober is the way. If happiness is the answer, I dunno...

 

[Ciggavelli]

To keep this music related, I found two new rap singles that I like a lot. They've been on repeat all day

 

[chesebert]

Given your love of bass, I'd recommend floor-standers over bookshelf speakers... else you'll probably want to add a subwoofer or two, which takes up even more space. Also, if you plan to move around the room a lot, prioritize speakers with wide dispersion. Unless you want horns or powered speakers, you're not going to be satisfied without a proper amp (see previous comment about your love of bass ). Honestly, there are a lot of great speakers at or under $12k these days, and powerful, SOTA amplifiers (Hypex/Purifi class D) are also available at very reasonable prices. Plus you can possibly use your Woo as a preamp, at least to start. It'll probably be a much smaller investment than your headphones, in part because you won't be tempted to own a handful of speakers... or so I'd guess!

Exactly - $12k for speakers + $20k for a pair of high quality subs and you are at $32k. You buy monitors for the WAF and the simpler crossover design and not to save money.

 

[psy472]

I like meditation, but it is often hard for me because I'm a thinker. I need to give it another go though. It could help. I did yoga a couple of times in rehab back in the day. It was pretty cool actually. Maybe I'll get into that more. I need something. I prefer something mind-altering, but that might just be my addiction talking to me. I hate life unadulterated. It is what it is. There's got to be a solution out there that won't kill me or leave me in jail. Alcohol works to some degree, but of course I overdo it given my personality. It's a tough situation.

Meditation is like standing along the road but then a car is speeding towards you at 100 MPH. When you first start, you would instinctively run for it. After you practice meditation for a while, then you’ll learn to distinguish where you are relative to the car before you act. Often you are standing on the side walk and the car is on the road. It’ll just zoom by if you let it go.

The reason why AA is very effective for others but not for some is the willingness to give up. Giving up your pride and guilt and openly sharing. It’s a form of confession. As long as you refuse to give up your pride, it’s like trying to pull a bull by its horn. It will just fight you all the way. Best way is to attract and lead it with some carrots instead. So, what entices you to give up alcohol? What is the sweet reward you want at the end of this all?

 

[Ciggavelli]

Meditation is like standing along the road but then a car is speeding towards you at 100 MPH. When you first start, you would instinctively run for it. After you practice meditation for a while, then you’ll learn to distinguish where you are relative to the car before you act. Often you are standing on the side walk and the car is on the road. It’ll just zoom by if you let it go.

The reason why AA is very effective for others but not for some is the willingness to give up. Giving up your pride and guilt and openly sharing. It’s a form of confession. As long as you refuse to give up your pride, it’s like trying to pull a bull by its horn. It will just fight you all the way. Best way is to attract and lead it with some carrots instead. So, what entices you to give up alcohol? What is the sweet reward you want at the end of this all?

Happiness, which is extremely rare in my life. I don’t even know if happiness is the answer to life’s mysteries, but it feels good. Are we just some mindless apes chasing happiness at all costs? That’s the question I’m faced with. Is happiness the answer, or do I just wait to die? I learned the secrets of the universe at like 22. It made me exceptionally smarter. Nobody could beat be in a debate. I got straight As all through grad school, on to my PhD as well. Nobody could fukc with me. But once you learn the secrets of the universe it makes you a nihilist. Nothing matters, it’s just a sliver of infinity. So, what’s the answer, when I was sober, it was chasing material things. When I started drinking again it was about personal connections. I told the rehab people today, I’m just a bad person sober. I come from 2 legit bad parents, so it’s only expected that I’d be bad too. I’m super negative. I’m on the left hand path for real. I start drinking and I’m a different person. I like to hang out with people a do fun things. I’m back into dating. Those are all positives, but they are the result of drinking. I didn’t do any of that sh!t when I was sober for 5 years. It was misery. I just wanted to die and was waiting for it. Now I want to live an experience children and love. It’s opened a new door for me, but at the cost of abusing alcohol too much. It’s a no-win situation. I’m fukced either way.