[Ttvetjanu]

I am a 20 year old student and I've noticed that whenever I drink, I drink too much. It's not the frequency of drinking but the amounts I drink. Alcohol is nothing new for me, I started drinking as a 16 year old, and to be honest, I havent previously had this problem. It is a much more recent problem, about last half a year has been really bad. I only drink socially, never alone.

I don't really get hangovers, only slightly dizzy the next morning.

I probably drink a lot because of a mediocre self asteem. I don't have any problem with my family, or friends, I've had a good childhood and so on. I am not depressed (although probably a bit lonely). I am not stupid, so I've tried all obvious things. I am not shy but I do have some difficulty getting girls. I have bad self control (obviously).

I've tried counting bottles, mentally agreeing that I would stay at a certain amount, only taking a certain amount of bottles and many other things, but eventually I either lose control, get drinks from friends or think that I am too sober and start accelerating the amount of drinks, which eventually spirals out of control. So much that I tend to have very little memory of the later hours.

This morning I woke up all bloody and had some faint memories of a fight, I had a note from the police in my pocket which contained the contact information of the person that attacked me. I've never been in a fight before.

So. I've now opened myself to a forum full of complete strangers. Any innovative solutions would be nice. Writing this is probably a good start.

Thanks

 

[Kirosia]

If you don't seem to be able to control yourself around liquor at all, stop. Don't go near it, ask your friends not to drink around you, don't go into a liquor store, just stay away. And if you feel this problem is very serious, talk to your loved ones. You may need professional help.

 

[breakfastchef]

You are an alcoholic. Get addiction counseling now.

 

[Hi-Finthen]

Common problem, and I give you credit well deserved to recognise the problem and the problems that come from the aggrandised drinking scene... You're very young (this is coming from someone in mid life now, who though of myself old at 23),to recognise and do what needs to be done to replace those activities with activities that can't be done while drinking...

Appreciate ice cream again and pies etc... As well as physical exercises like ball playing or biking and the friendships that will come from those associations etc...

Best of luck bud!

Lots of good advice to follow here, I'm sure!

 

[Jon L]

Jeez, young students don't drink heavily and get into trouble anymore these days? Call me old-fashioned.

I would recommend:

Don't drink AND drive.
Don't drink alone and make sure there is somebody you can trust around.

 

[Ttvetjanu]

Quote:

Originally Posted by breakfastchef /img/forum/go_quote.gif You are an alcoholic. Get addiction counseling now.

I wouldnt go as far as to say I am an alcoholic. I don't drink every weekend, neither do I 'urge' for a drink. It is just the high amounts that I drink when I drink which bothers me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jon L /img/forum/go_quote.gif Jeez, young students don't drink heavily and get into trouble anymore these days? Call me old-fashioned. I would recommend: Don't drink AND drive. Don't drink alone and make sure there is somebody you can trust around.

That is sort of what i expected to hear (and partially wanted to hear).

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kirosia /img/forum/go_quote.gif If you don't seem to be able to control yourself around liquor at all, stop. Don't go near it, ask your friends not to drink around you, don't go into a liquor store, just stay away. And if you feel this problem is very serious, talk to your loved ones. You may need professional help.

This would mean skipping about half of all social gatherings we have together.

 

[filipelli]

at OP: Congratulations. First opening up and realizing you have a problem that you want to fix, is the hardest step to take. I have a friend who has been able to cut himself off the drink completely for 3 months now, and while it is a constant battle for him, he is able to do it because people support him. He had experiences like you described, and that is where his motivation to get off alcholol stems from. I personally avoid alcohol because I too have an addictive personality. I found that just finding yourself a replacement (less destructive addiction) is a good way to reduce the detrimental one. How about ordering an ice cold coke, or rootbeer to replace the drink. It works for my friend. Also telling your friends what you want to do, as well as asking for help and support from the people around you really helps as well, as they encourage you along the hard times of your journey. When they know what you want to do, they can help you limit your intake, because the real you wants the control.


I am sorry breakfast chef, but a tone like that does not help anyone. Including people who have substance addictions. It's a bit accusatory and not supportive.

 

[breakfastchef]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttvetjanu /img/forum/go_quote.gif I wouldnt go as far as to say I am an alcoholic. I don't drink every weekend, neither do I 'urge' for a drink. It is just the high amounts that I drink when I drink which bothers me.

You are not ready for help as you are still in denial. Do a web search, in any language of your choice, on alcohol addiction. You will probably see many lists of questions. Answering yes to one or several of these questions would give you an indication if you have a problem. There are many types of alcoholism. Do some research and figure out how not to screw up your life.

 

[Jaska]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttvetjanu /img/forum/go_quote.gif Any innovative solutions would be nice.

Unfortunately, there are really no "innovative" solutions other than to stay completely away from alcohol forever, and I think you know that. I'm in Finland, and would gladly take the time to talk to you about your situation if care to send me a PM.

 

[MaZa]

In my own point of view, a person who drinks too much at once but it isnt constant habbit, isnt an alcoholic as in addicted to alcohol, he just doesnt handle his drinking whenever it starts. A person who HAS to drink alcohol, no matter what amount and even if its only a one bottle of beer in every second day and feel disturbed if he cannot have it, he is an alcoholic. But no matter, training self discipline is equally good for both. And if it proves to be impossible (many times it does), stopping drinking altogether is pretty much only option, and a good one.

In that case, avoid situations and people where there might be a lot of alcohol available for consuming. Now, going to spend quality time and visit a friend-family and eating a lunch with a bottle of wine on table for drink might be okay, its up to you if you drink a glass or not, (do you want to be absolutist or not), the amount available doesnt probaply be enough to give you a need to go drunk. Asking a support from your friends or relatives to decrease your drinking or even stopping it altogether is good. If your friends ridicule the attempt and wont take it seriously, even try to harm it "are you getting soft? heres a vodka shot for you", its time to look for new friends who wont harm your goal and instead help you.

 

[mbriant]

Quote:

In my own point of view, a person who drinks too much at once but it isnt constant habbit, isnt an alcoholic as in addicted to alcohol, he just doesnt handle his drinking whenever it starts.

It's still a form of alcholism. It's called "binge drinking", and it's apparently actually harder to beat/control than regular "needs to drink every day" alcoholism. The only cure is not to have that first drink. That's where the problem lies, because the alcoholic gets lulled into thinking they don't have a problem and can easily control themselves ( because they've managed to go a few days without drinking ), but once they start drinking, they can't stop. To control it, one has to completely stay away from situations where he is tempted to drink. This often means a drastic change of lifestyle and even sometimes certain friends. Not easy to do, but necessary if one truly wants to stay clean and sober.

(I know this because I just heard it two days ago on some new television rehab reality show.)

 

[Ttvetjanu]

How do you recommend training self discipline? I will not give up alcohol, I mean, seriously. I am only 20 years old and it is not a constant habit for me to drink.

 

[MaZa]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mbriant /img/forum/go_quote.gif It's still a form of alcholism. It's called "binge drinking", and it's apparently actually harder to beat/control than regular "needs to drink every day" alcoholism. The only cure is not to have that first drink. (I know this because I just heard it two days ago on some new television rehab reality show.)

I see. But I believe that true. As a word, alcoholic, I have always understood it in same fashion as drug addict.

 

[Kirosia]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttvetjanu /img/forum/go_quote.gif How do you recommend training self discipline? I will not give up alcohol, I mean, seriously. I am only 20 years old and it is not a constant habit for me to drink.

Grow up. You have a drinking problem, you need to stop. Get professional help. Catching and remedying it now is VERY important, or else what's gonna happen when get married and have a family to take care of? As well as a full-on occupation? The fact that you started this threads show you realize that this is a big issue.

 

[Jaska]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ttvetjanu /img/forum/go_quote.gif How do you recommend training self discipline? I will not give up alcohol, I mean, seriously. I am only 20 years old and it is not a constant habit for me to drink.

The kind of alcohol problem you describe is the kind that will eventually end up ruining your life. A person with no alcohol problem does not ever wake up bloody with no memory of what happened the night before.

Please be skeptical of any advice you might get to continue drinking, but in moderation. You've already proven to yourself that even with considerable mental focus, you sometimes can't quit before it's too late.