[Dexter Morgan]

That's it, I'm moving to Thailand. How much is a gallon of gasoline?

 

[fiascogarcia]

 

[Watagump]

A young boy comes home from school in a bad mood. His father asks him, "What's wrong, son?" The kid tells his dad that he's upset because another kid has been teasing him and calling him gay. The father says, "Punch him in the face next time he does that. I bet he'll stop." The kid replies, "Yeah, but he's so cute!"

 

[fiascogarcia]

  So who is it? Charlie Sheen?
 
http://radaronline.com/celebrity-news/hollywood-aids-scare-superstar-desperate-battle/

Hah, you were spot on!

 

[Malevolent]

  You should try taking a plane or train next time! 

Plane tickets are expensive, my friend. Thought we could hike our way to Japan. 

 

[Malevolent]

  Hah, you were spot on!

 
I'm still shocked at the news. I shouldn't be (it's Sheen, after all), but still..

 

[Watagump]

  Hah, you were spot on!

 
A little too easy. 

 

[Watagump]

Can I borrow that book of yours How To Become A Millionaire? 

Sure. Here you are. 

Thanks - but half the pages are missing. 

What's the matter? Isn't half a million enough for you?

 

[fiascogarcia]

Some handy tips here.
 

 

[Watagump]

UPS showed up today with my loaner toys, be jealous.
 

 

[The Life]

  UPS showed up today with my loaner toys, be jealous.
 

 
I guess they lost the best toy of the bunch
 

 

[Watagump]

   
I guess they lost the best toy of the bunch
 

 
I need to move to a place that doesn't have mail boxes now. 

 

[Watagump]

A teacher is teaching a class and she sees that Johnny isn't paying attention, so she asks him, "If there are three ducks sitting on a fence, and you shoot one, how many are left?" Johnny says, "None." The teacher asks, "Why?" Johnny says, "Because the shot scared them all off." The teacher says, "No, two, but I like how you're thinking." Johnny asks the teacher, "If you see three women walking out of an ice cream parlor, one is licking her ice cream, one is sucking her ice cream, and one is biting her ice cream, which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking her ice cream." Johnny says, "No, the one with the wedding ring, but I like how you're thinking!"

 

[Watagump]

Why exactly does this dude have glasses on?
 

 

[Watagump]

Q: Is Google male or female? 
A: Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion.