[Uncle Erik]

I've done this a number of times. It might happen again in the near future, as well.

Just show up - don't have an agenda. Go in, say hello and ask how he's doing. Let the conversation go where it goes. Attentive listening is more important than anything else.

 

[BlindTiger]

You're going there with your family, right?
don't worry bout it,
you're with family, in the end that's all we got.
we're readying ourselves for that time, my mother has stage III lung ca.
it''s been almost 5 years since initial dx and we value each and every day she's with us.

 

[TheMarchingMule]

Thanks everybody for the advice and empathy. It really helped ease my nervousness before I got there.

My family and I sat in the room with him and his wife, and we talked for a few hours until he began to get tired, and so we left to let him take a nap. It actually felt better seeing him instead of just imagining how he was doing, and he was able to joke and laugh still.

It was just really moving when he gave me something that he found in an antique shop 15 years or so ago (that's when I was only 4), and the surreal backstory is that as soon as he saw it, he told himself aloud that he would give it to me before he passes away. I guess we all didn't expect that day to come so soon.

 

[Uncle Erik]

I'm glad you went. Is he close by? You should drop in as often as possible - it would mean a lot.

 

[TheMarchingMule]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Uncle Erik /img/forum/go_quote.gif I'm glad you went. Is he close by? You should drop in as often as possible - it would mean a lot.

Me too.

From San Jose to San Francisco? Not really, but hopefully I can indeed see him at least one more time.

 

[BIG POPPA]

When my Grandmothers 2nd husband was in the hospital and everything was going bad. I was there and for some reason I was commenting how the nurses where looking at him and flirting. He was laughing the best he could. It was fun. I was threatening to bring some Tequila to go out right and it was just a very enjoyably visit. I celebrated his last days. No sympathy from me. He was a mans man, I let him go a mans man.