[JaGWiRE]

Alright, a bit of a long / complicated story, but here goes...

My sister is 17 years old and works at a day camp. Today was the overnight day so she was supose to stay over night with the kids in her group. She called my mom around 11 PM saying she had some chest pains. I have asthma, and my mom usually gives my sister her inhalers when she has chest pains (even though she hasn't been proven for asthma or whatever.) So my mom goes to pick my sister up (I decide to come with as I am not tired or doing anything), and my sister is really nagging about pains. My mom really is hyper sensitive to this stuff, and decided to take her to the hospital (Mount Sinai, the one she considers the best.) This is where my whole story of sadness begins.

I get to the hospital, and already am not happy / freaking out as I have a fear of hospitals (they are great places, but I have a weak stomach and hate to see people in pain.) There are maybe 5-10 people waiting sitting, a few people in wheel chairs, and a couple on beds (or whatever what the paramedics use are called.) After about an hour of sitting, they take my sister and mom in, but unforteuntly leave me waiting outside. Around me was a women with hepatitis C (paramedics who handled her even were wearing gloves) who was acting nutty (she was strapped up) who must had been under the influence of extremely severe drugs such as heiroin and cocaine due to her nuttiness (the people sitting with me thought this too), she was found in a park nude. She was in a white blanket as she had no clothing. Beside me, was what I thought was a brother and sister, but really a couple (17 year old female and 20 old guy) from up north who were in this hospital because the female was having her second baby (premature like the first she had 1.5 years earlier, so they flew her in an emergency helicopter as this hospital is highly regarded). Then there were some other people who were with their elderly parents and the more sane problems, one women really made me depressed as she was waiting there in a wheel chair (she had gull stone problems) in utter pain (her faces were enough to bring her to the hospital I am sure, she was later hooked up to morphine and was very upset.)

So, after my mom goes in I get bored and figure I might as well begin to make conversasion (which is where I learn about these different people around me as he (the guy with the wife who had her second hild at 17) was in the emergency waiting room longer then me and was listening observantly to what people were diagnosed with / symptons / etc.) Anyway, we begin talking and I learn about his girlfriend and him, and I get really upset about how people choose to path their lives or atleast how peoples lives end up. In the meanwhile as we talk, the women on the bed with hepatitis C is acting up (we are watching although I was getting very upset and depressed seeing somebody lke this), this women is being guarded by paramedics even though she is strapped up as she is constantly removing this white blanket on top of her, letting us all see her private parts disgusting me. She is about 40 years old or so, which really made me sad..

Anyway, I get into some deeper conversasion and I learn that this guy is into computers as myself. Unforteuntly, he seemed to be a guy who really thinks he knows what he doesn't. For example, I ask him what motherboard he has and he says he has a $1500 ASrock motherboard (I then tell him it's the lower line of Asus and he begins arguing with me.) He then tells me has has a tripple core 6.5 ghz 4800 amd specifically built by some special company who mods cpus or something (yeah, really.) I then begin to talk with his girlfriend who says that most people in hospitals are stupid and this and that thinking shes the know it all and is the best person to get advice from (meanwhile she has 2 children, is 17, and dropped out of high school.) Anyway, later on a guy came in who was drunk and had 72 double shots of beer (he is 140 pounds and diabetic, not smart if you ask me.)

By this point, I am ridiculously upset. After about 4 hours we left, and on the way home when I was mentioning the really sad surroundings around me, which leads my mom to mentionioning her friend who is the same age as her (50 or so I believe), who she used to date back in high school I believe who also has hepatitis, except he has it from a bad blood transfusion (bad blood) (this made me even more so depressed as he got it in a way he could not control, unlike the women on drugs who probably got it from something like sharing needles or whatever). This guy is very sick and needs a liver transplant or transfusion (whatever its called) as the hepatitis has been getting to him. Last year he had an surgery with 80% chance of death and he survived. After my mom told me this story, I was pretty much in tears and already knew I was not sleeping tonight after the combination of what I saw and heard at the hospital and in the car.

Now I realise some of you might tell me I am an oversensitive person (it might be that I'm a kid and don't see these things on a regular basis), but this really upset me. Maybe you'll tell me to grow up and welcome to the real world, which I probably need to do, but I'm still a kid so that's alright.

Anyway, I just posted this blurb hoping you guys might have something to say that might make me feel better. I already have came to the conclusion I won't be sleeping tonight most likely.


BTW, my sisters problem after some cardio tests, x-rays and other tests weren't resolved (don't know what it was), but my mom and the guy who was working with my sister think it's a reflex problem (she was having pains in her back too from what I remember.)

 

[Kees]

You obviously care about what happens to the people around you.
That is good.
Make shure you keep doing that.
It pays back. Big time.
And don't worry, you'll find your way to deal with it without becoming too upset all the time.

 

[1911]

you have a combination of being sensitive and also you are condescending. you cant judge the quality of other people's lives and think the way you choose to live is better. it is better for you but not for everyone. the next person you talk to could pity you for your sad existence hanging out and posting thousands of posts on a geek board. advice..learn and choose not to make decisions which would be a mistake for you but stop being judgmental of others.

 

[JaGWiRE]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kees You obviously care about what happens to the people around you. That is good. Make shure you keep doing that. It pays back. Big time. And don't worry, you'll find your way to deal with it without becoming too upset all the time.

I hope so. I still am really upset, does anybody have any ideas of what might take this off my mind? I've began to watch one of my favourite movies, but I keep getting back to thinking about what I saw tonight.

1911, thanks for the advice, I'll keep that in mind. I supose I am looking at people without knowing the full story, but I guess my mind just considers people who are on very hard drugs and embarass themselves in society by walking around naked lesser in morals then myself.

 

[1911]

yeah i see people like that all the time....and i really feel sorry for their kids..but their usually is a sad story behind it all..no one grows up wanting to be that way.....

you said you were bothered by what you saw and seeing suffering in others is not pleasant but what do you think is really bothering you about all this?

ps if i said i would send you a can from my collection would that cheer you up?

 

[JaGWiRE]

Quote:

Originally Posted by 1911 yeah i see people like that all the time....and i really feel sorry for their kids..but their usually is a sad story behind it all..no one grows up wanting to be that way..... you said you were bothered by what you saw and seeing suffering in others is not pleasant but what do you think is really bothering you about all this? ps if i said i would send you a can from my collection would that cheer you up?

1911, anything free is always nice and gets you in the right mood, but at this point I am not even sure why I posted this, I was hoping I'de be told to go pick up a copy of this song/album, listen to it while laying in bed and forget about what I saw this night.

BTW, thanks for being honest, I often say things and don't think about how I think.

 

[JaGWiRE]

To top it off, I have had a weird smell since I left the hospital. I just began sniffing, and it smells like the essence or stink I had in my clothes after I left the Hamilton meet. I then remembered the guys in Hamilton smoked and the smell on my clothing was from the smoke, and the guy at the hospital smoked (the 20 year old), and was sitting right beside me. I hate the smell of smoke, it lays in your clothes for a while and your room too. I guess I'll shower in a few hours when everbody wakes up so I don't disturb anybody.

 

[Homeless]

Without trying to give you the usual welcome to real life speel (because you said you didn't want to hear that even though you expected it), what you saw was tame. I used to work in a hospital doing security and I could tell you some stories. My shifts were bounced around between three different hospitals in the city one of which has a psych ward...you wanna see weirdos? spend an hour there...

I think reactions depend on the person...I'm not really bothered by things like that because ultimately it's their life...their decisions (for the most part) led them to where ever they are. My ultimate goal in life is to be a police officer for my city (probably apply in January 07 as I just got a really sweet job that'll last until June 07) and I think that this attitude is needed if you want to police or be a paramedic/doctor, or firefighter. It's not that I don't care for other people, I'm quite a compassionate person...just that I won't allow it to affect my everyday life.

 

[ken36]

Bless them all and feel good about your self.

 

[Carl]

The cycle of tragedy will continue unabated. It is up to us to eke what happiness we can within our ephemeral existance. Because life is bittersweet, it is beauiful.

 

[Jahn]

i hope everything turns out ok for your sister, that can be a scary thing.

 

[jbloudg20]

Really, though, its just your inexperience. Life sucks. Life is hard on people. The best thing you can do is surround yourself with loved ones, and lead the best life you know how. Worrying about all the bad things in the world will only drive you to insanity.

 

[bahamaman]

I don't mean to be unkind, or insensitive to the fact you're young, but where's the story here? You were in a waiting room in a hospital and saw people who were sick and who made bad choices? Well, yeah!

I think you need to get out from behind your computer's screen a bit more and experience the real world.

 

[RichardCory]

.

 

[n_maher]

Quote:

Originally Posted by JaGWiRE I often say things and don't think about how I think.

Here's a tip, if you are aware that you're doing what you describe above why don't you try and stop doing it instead of just using it as a crutch everytime someone questions what you say?