Humor is one way to deal with tragedy. Whether it's the "best way" is open for debate. But when it's used, it helps to know the difference between laughing with someone and laughing at them.
A great man has died, a man whose contributions were impressive. Despite his advanced age, his death is still going to be a blow to his family. It ought to evoke a moment of awe and gratitude within the headfi community, particularly since headphone enthusiasts were among those who most directly benefited from this man's genius. It shouldn't elicit cheap shots, either toward his product line or toward his family.
Joking about whether his wife will be wearing a "veil" is tasteless for two reasons. First, you don't bring the man's family into this, particularly for a cheap joke. It's to be assumed that his family is suffering now, particularly his wife. Do I need to remind anyone what veils are used for at funerals? They're to give dignity to the bereaved, so that their tears are afforded a bit of privacy. It takes courage for the family to stand there, at the funeral, knowing how many eyes will be upon them, sizing up their grief. A widow's veil is a poor target for mockery, and laughing about whether Sennheiser's wife will be wearing one, is just crass.
Second, a man's death is no time to bring up his shortcomings - whether real or perceived. There's a reason everyone sounds like a saint at their own funeral (and why we don't hold funerals for people who "don't deserve" one). It's a matter of respect to the departed that you show appreciation, not your talents at Olympic scoring. Let God and history judge the man, and let them both be as critical as the task demands, but let human beings - attending to the feelings of the bereaved - not kick a man when he's down, and at a moment when he can't reply or reform.
The death of Fritz Sennheiser is not really an apt time to discuss the famous Sennheiser "veil." If you want to laugh with the man, not at him, don't bring up a product deficiency - whether real or perceived - as a punchline at his grave. I've been to plenty of funerals where humor was used, but never to diminish the man in the box. I didn't know Fritz Sennheiser, but I'm sure he was a character, with quirks, idiosyncrasies and mannerisms that endeared him to his friends and family. I doubt they'd properly included a drive-by comment about the Sennheiser "veil," a point of criticism that has generated the reply from defenders: "They're not veiled; they're laid back."
One more point about humor: We engage in humor as a way of distancing ourselves from pain and sorrow. We walk a psychological tightrope as we try to balance ourselves between the serious and the silly. The more serious things are, the more welcome humor becomes in offsetting one imbalance with another, in an attempt to restore the greater balance. As the saying goes: If a man falls down a staircase and breaks his neck, that's tragedy; if he falls down the same staircase, but gets up and walks it off, it's funny. What's funniest is not the man's pain (though there are reasons people laugh at each other's misfortunes) but the fact the man was able walk away, albeit with a funny gait.
When a great man dies, he should have the last laugh, not become the object of ridicule. Barring a heaven, where we all run naked through a spring field of daisies and sunflowers, losing one's life is about as great a loss as one can suffer. If he left behind people who loved him, his death is no time to laugh at his life's work - even with a one-liner or two. A better comedic choice would be one that pays tribute to the man. If anything, this might be the time to toss a grenade at one of his rivals, all of whom at least have breath in them.
Since tasteless humor knows no bounds (and my critics will say I'm simply a humorless prude), let me throw a few one-liners out there, so you can criticize my wares:
Q. Why did Fritz Sennheiser have to die?
A. God wanted a pair of HD800s.
Q. Why didn't God call Grado home?
A. He couldn't afford a pair of PS1000s. He'd also gotten burned on the GS1000.
Q. What does it say on the outside of Sennheiser's coffin?
A. Crafted to Perfection
Q. How do you know it's Sennheiser's coffin?
A. It's the only one with velour on the inside and a 30 ft. extension cord.
Q. Is it true they added additional security to the gravesite.
A. Yes, Cardas kept trying to offer a replacement cable.
Q. Have you been to the gravesite?
A. No, but I heard Geraldo Rivera is already there.
Q. Have you learned anything from the grave diggers?
A. They were told to leave it open but to dig deeper.
Q. Are there going to be any celebrities at the funeral?
A. Pee Wee Herman wanted to come but he pulled something. Chuck Norris said he prefers the kick from his Denons. Lindsey Lohan plans to crash the funeral, but only if Paris Hilton will drive. The cast from Lost wanted to make it but they still don't know where they are. The head of BP said he didn't want headphones that leak that much sound. Jesse James admitted he's been secretly listening to Bose. Simon Cowell said he'd come even though he finds funerals "utterly dreadful." Ben Stiller is coming but he wants to dress up like an HD800. Angelina Jolie said she and Brad would come but only if they could adopt the corpse. James Cameron said he wants to film the whole thing in 3D. Conan was going to help with the eulogy but Jay Leno got the gig - and with jokes so lame they knocked Lance Armstrong off his bike. John Grado said he'd come, too, but only if he could sit up front. Westone told him to stick it in his ear.
