LOL
I was feeling inspired, so I wrote this:
RadioSchack:
You've got questions, we've got blank stares
Bob walks into RS, triggering the Infra-Red(tm) Sonic Door Announcer System, looking for a box of computer floppies. He's got a sample in his hand, to show the clerks so he gets the right ones. After waiting around for half an hour for the two clerks to finish up trying to ring up a cellular phone for an impatient-looking fat lady, Bob catches the clerks' attention and asks, "Do you have any of these computer diskettes?" while waving the floppy in the air.
The clerk automagically replies, "I'll have to check my cash register. Why don't you entertain yourself by running one of these underpowered and overpriced remote controlled car-things around the store?"
After fifteen minutes of the clerk typing randomly and flipping through the wide assortment of catalogs, the clerk replies, "I'm sorry, we don't appear to carry any. Would you like me to special-order them for an extra $50 shipping charge on the $5 package?"
However, Bob by this time has found the diskettes, hanging in plain view in the "Computer Accessories" section, in a wide assortment of colors. He says to the clerk, "Of course you've got them in stock! They're right here! $5 for a box of 50 in all colors!"
The clerk, still as self-assured and self-confident as ever, says that "Well, the computer says that we've NEVER stocked OPA627-ND opamp chips, so you must be mistaken."
"OPA6-what? I WANT COMPUTER FLOPPIES!"
"Look, sir, I'm sorry, but electronics is a rather complex field, and I'm a skilled professional. ShackRadio tries to stock as many parts as possible, but sometimes we still have to special order parts."
"Well, evidently you're a very specialised professional since you can't even recognize something as simple as a floppy disk! Look, you've even got two models, the "Imation High-Capacity" and the "Tandy TRS-80 Proprietary"! Of course, the latter is twice as expensive, but here they are!"
"Did you say the e-word? Aha! I knew we had some all the time, let me see. You never should have doubted me... Well, the Imations are a store brand, and you can't expect the reliability and compatibility as the Tandies. You get what you pay for, you know. Well, I assume you want the TRS disks for your computer, then?"
"Well, I only want the best, my data's very important... But are you sure they'll work on my iMac? They *do* say 'Proprietary'..."
"OF COURSE they'll work! The Proprietary is an old industry slang term for super-compatible, and I should know since I *do* work here. Besides, the iMacs take nearly every type of floppy except the cheap Imations!"
The clerk walked up to the computer terminal to ring up the disks. "Lets see here... Have you ever shopped before at RadioShack or any other Tandy-corp owned subidary or parent company?"
"No, I don't think so."
"Well, I'll need some personal data for our database, so we can send you all sorts of annoying spam and junk mail..."
"Sure, if you guys send it it must be okay..."
"Name?"
"Bob Marley"
"Address?"
"521 East Peach Street, Bozeman, Montana, 59715"
"Phone number?"
"406-587-9466"
"Credit card number?"
"3482-4823-2963-2943"
*clerk scribbles on personal notepad*
"Social Security Number?"
"34-55923-449"
"Date of Birth?"
"7/4/76"
"Just stick your thumb right on this ink pad for a sec, now put it on this sheet of paper..."
"Have you or do you plan to commit any offenses against the law of this or any other country, or do you plan to criticize in print or verbally Tandy Corporation or its subsidiary, RadioShack, so help you God? (put your hand on this bible before answering)"
"Uh, I don't think so, and I'm an atheist..."
"Well, can I see your credit card, photo ID, and a suitible bribe?"
*Bob hands over requested items*
"Thank you. Here's your goods. Have a nice day!"
Well, I'm not Tolkien...
Names changed to protect the innocent. This story is based on several visits to RadioShack stores around the area, and should not be construed as an invitation for Tandy Corporation to sic their lawyers on me.
is good enough
