Why I like the friend zone

[Spareribs]

I have read reports on the internet where guys are NOT liking the friend zone from girls. For me, I like it. 
 
Why?
 
I am in the friend zone with this girl and her boy friend handles all the drama from her. He also handles the ugly side of her personality.
 
For me, I enjoy her conversation and see mostly her positive cheerful side. Basically, when you are in the friend zone, the bad personal stuff is filtered out. 
 
The friend zone can actually be better because it's easy and simple. I embrace the friend zone. I enjoy her smile and conversation without all the drama. So give the friend zone a chance. It may actually work better. 

 

[ProtegeManiac]

The friendzone isn't so bad when you're the shoulder to cry on who gets to be the....errr, nah I'm gonna get censored again if I complete that. Use your imagination. Clue: "cowgirl."

 

That said my personal experience is very different. One is the "forgot you were straight-zoned," where for example during one study session one girl arrives and talks about how her date the previous night was pushing her down towards his crotch and she nearly barfed when he opened his zipper. I had to yell out from behind my laptop, "I'M HERE!!!" and until now, when I see the guy, all I can think of is, "dude use some anti-perspirant down there or get a thigh gap!" The other is this girl who kept addressing me as "older brother" (societies with Confucian influences have one word terms for addressing higher or lower birth rank siblings)  that at some point I just gave up and call her "shobe" (although that's partially because I met someone hotter and more adventurous and did not demand commitment),

 

[mechgamer123]

I think it's because most guys are interested in, err, being more than friends but mostly for physical reasons.
 
If you're not interested in that then the friend zone is a fine place to be for sure

 

[ProtegeManiac]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mechgamer123 /img/forum/go_quote.gif

I think it's because most guys are interested in, err, being more than friends but mostly for physical reasons.

 

Well there are friends who get physical with no attachments beyond that. It's just more common between two girls than a guy and a girl. 

 

There is one more zone though - the "Daddyzone." Used to be I think it would be a lot more like "SugarDaddyzone" until I got the weird end of the stick - a girl who too soon started calling me Daddy. I mean here it's common practice for the spouses to call each other by their parental titles so the kids grow up using those (ie rather than have Lisa Simpson hear Marge and even Bart say "Homer" and then imitate it), but at the very least, the earliest a girl would do that is when she's already very pregnant. Or when you've been together long enough to have kinky codenames, but even then their use of Dad is more of the same reason as when training a child and is a signal that you should make plans to make one already (ie get your financials together so she can stop the pills). That weird one though started doing it on our first night together, then curled into fetal position sucking her thumb whispering "don't leave Daddy" with her head buried in my neck. Normally I'd find that cute in a cat or a dog, but when it was a human (who isn't a furry roleplaying as someone from the musical CATS) my brain just went RED FLAG RED FLAG RED FLAG. Good thing it was Tinder and I used a second phone (I already trashed the sim card) because it got progressively weirder after that.

 

[MikePio]

  I think it's because most guys are interested in, err, being more than friends but mostly for physical reasons.
 
If you're not interested in that then the friend zone is a fine place to be for sure

 
It is not just guys that are interested in "physical" things, women tend to be just as enthusiastic but are far more subtle and discrete about it. In general I can't stand the term "friend zone". I think why this term came about is because some guys have a problem (this relates to women less obviously) with understanding and acting upon the difference between having a woman as a friend or a lover and they get stuck in no-man's land. So our unfortunate guy is stranded in this friend relationship having romantic thoughts and the poor woman kind of gets confused and the situation becomes unpleasant. I must admit, I have been a victim of this myself

. The conclusion is simple, if you like your woman "friend" make your intentions clear and make a move. If she rejects (ouch, but it happens) I suggest you accept friendship strictly or move on (sometimes it is just better to do the latter). 

 

[Music Alchemist]

There was a time in my life when most of my friends were female. I didn't have romantic feelings for most of them in the first place. When you hang out with (or just talk to) a girl all the time and she isn't your girlfriend, you don't really think of typical date things (like going to movies, shopping, bla bla) as dates. And then there's the whole "getting physical" thing when she still isn't "officially" your girlfriend, but you're obviously more than friends. What do you call that anyway? (I don't think of it as "friends with benefits" in my case...)

 

[jmills8]

Basically the guy in the Friend Zone is called the "worker Ant" or "soldier". He is there to do things for the female.

 

[przem]

 
I am in the friend zone with this girl and her boy friend handles all the drama from her. He also handles the ugly side of her personality.

Isn't it usually the other way round, though? Friendzoned dude is a shoulder to cry on, and the partner is getting all the good stuff? At least that how it was when I was high school.

Anyway, if you're not interested in an intimate relationship with a girl, is it still a friendzone? I'd call it friendship.

 

[Music Alchemist]

  Anyway, if you're not interested in an intimate relationship with a girl, is it still a friendzone? I'd call it friendship.

 
Ya know, that's a good point.
 
Wikipedia's definition: "The friend zone is a situation in which one of two friends wishes to enter into a romantic or sexual relationship, while the other does not."

 

[Spareribs]

Good point.

Being forced into the friend zone in that situation can be good too if you later realize that she's the wrong girl for romance or if you later see she became too over weight or something. Sometimes, going to a different path in life is better.

 

[jmills8]

Mistakes and wishful thinking gets a boy in the "Friend Zone". Basically this friend zone is her making use of a boy who has a lot of free time to cater to her wishes. Women see a low value on boys they put in the "friend zone".

 

[Music Alchemist]

Mistakes and wishful thinking gets a boy in the "Friend Zone". Basically this friend zone is her making use of a boy who has a lot of free time to cater to her wishes. Women see a low value on boys they put in the "friend zone".

 
Let's not forget about the guy putting the girl in the friend zone. I've done that to plenty of 'em!

 
I don't think of it as putting a low value on a person, though; it's just when you want to be friends with someone who happens to have feelings for you.

 

[jmills8]

Let's not forget about the guy putting the girl in the friend zone. I've done that to plenty of 'em!

Thats a great thing to have while one has atleast another one in the "Bed Zone".

 

[przem]

I don't think of it as putting a low value on a person, though; it's just when you want to be friends with someone who happens to have feelings for you.

Exactly, sometimes you just like a person of an opposite sex without being attracted to them, and you don't really have a control over their feelings. You can tell them you only want to be friends and so on, and they'll still fall in love / wish for sex. Sometimes this stuff just happens and it can be difficult for a "friend-zoning" side as well.

 

[Spareribs]

That has never happened to me. I've never had a girl who wanted to be more than just friends. It's a good thing because it makes life simple.