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Originally Posted by davidhunternyc /img/forum/go_quote.gif
At this point, nobody knows and nobody will ever know why he committed suicide. Its all just speculation from here on out. Only Heath knew himself. But even then, maybe he didn't know why he did it. The mind is a tricky thing. By the way, DomonicLemming, what are the twisted parts of your mind you said you rather liked?
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I think about lot of things in ways normal people wouldn't.
My username, for example. I've been using it for going on 7 years now, in various places. It stemmed from a conversation I had with a friend - who is now a professional bum and quite enjoying it - in AP Biology class. We were talking about lemmings, which are small rodents that live in Antarctica. No one knows why, but every few generations entire colonies of them make a mass exodus to the ocean, where they all jump in and promptly turn into lemmingcubes. No one knows why they do that. I postulated to my friend that there was probably some devious, demonic little person of a lemming that told all the other lemmings to jump. DemonicLemming was born out of that little conversation and has been going strong since. People who know me in person are rarely surprised when I tell them that, since they seem to think it fits in pretty well with my personality.
I've also randomly come up with torture ideas that make even my aunt, a seasoned ER radiologist, wince. I've taken enough psychology classes to understand quite a bit about the human mind, and combined with a very clinical, experimental mind, I love doing or saying certain things to specific people or groups, to see what kind of reaction I'll get. Even people in my family have said I never do anything or ask a single question without some motive behind it. My aunt once told me that if I ever got married (which I won't), and I had a kid, while everyone else was being awed by the "miracle of birth", I'd be standing there with a clipboard, recording observations and the like.
A lot of people are scared of the dark things that occasionally get churned up from the depths of their minds. On the other hand, I quite like to grab those things, pull them out of the muck and wash them off, and examine them. Once you know why certain things rise to the top, and how and why they're formed, you get a lot better control over your mind. A lot of people are also frightened to try new things - be it a new food, a new job, a new genre of music of type of book, a new drug, a new activity. I'll do damned near anything new (with the exception of some food) just to see what it's like, and to be able to compare what the actual experience is like, vs what the typical person thinks it's like.
I think some people don't like to do new things because they worry it might be dangerous. True, and plenty of it is, and I've gotten myself into trouble quite a few times when any normal person would have never been where I was. But if one never tries anything new, or only tries the safe stuff, what's the point in living? It seems banal, and moreover, boring to me. In middle school, I was probably one of the most reticent, inverted people in my entire school. Drugs were bad because they were, rock music wasn't good because it wasn't "wholesome", and laws were made by smart people who thought about things really hard before they made any decisions. I asked questions, but only when I thought they were allowed and never if they might offend anyone. A few years later, with a lot of reality under my belt, and a much more cynical and cutting view of life, I'm completely different. Sure, drugs might be bad, but how do you know which ones aren't as bad until you try? Metal is instinctual, and those happy little cotton candy songs that are so popular are about as real as cartoons. I question anything and everything, and if I piss people off when I do so, good - I'm shaking the dust off ideas people have never really considered before. If someone says something doesn't work, I try it myself. If someone says a particular method is old-fashioned and works, I try to find a new way to do it. It might not be better, but it'll be new, and maybe it'll help me think of a different way to go about doing something.
I'll leave my little personal description at that, but when it comes down to it, I've offended a hell of a lot of people, challenged the way quite a few people think, argued with some important people (the manager of the Camaro project at GM, as an example) about things that everyone else seemed to take for granted, tried damn near anything that sounded interesting, and found out that I still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up (I'm 23 now), and that there's way too much interesting stuff to see and do and read and experience by allowing myself to get mortared into the wall without trying as much of it as I can. I don't doubt that one day my curiosity will get me killed, but as long as I'm trying something new, I'm not too worried about it. Everyone dies eventually, and if I can't do it on the battlefield (another interesting bit, I'm what most Christians would consider a pagan, even though I don't think of myself strictly as one, and it's not the new-age touchy-feely where can I get legal weed? paganism) with a sword in my hand surrounded by my enemies, then dammit, I won't die in bed of old age if I have anything to say about it.
As far as the movie, well, I haven't been to see anything new in quite a while, even though I literally live within throwing distance of a 31-screen AMC theater with a few IMAX screens, but I just might get out this weekend and see this movie. I quite liked the first, and this one sounds pretty good too. Sorry for the hijack