Personal Problems [HELP]
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greenhorn

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Hey, Fizz,

Talk to HER, not to him (and certainly do not email him!!!)! Just tell her that, if she is really willing to give up your relation in favour of a relation with your so-called "friend", she's free to do so - but tell her also that, once she takes the decision, there will be no way back. Tell her that OK, you understood that she took pleasure in accepting the compliments etc. from the other dude, but that now she really has to choose.

Believe me, if she will accept to continue dating one of her boyfriend's "good friends", you won't miss much getting rid of her and you will be a winner.

On the other hand, if she really loves you, she will immediately stop talking to that "friend" of yours - at least until he stops his advances.

All the best to you!
 
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post-203678
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jpelg

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Quote:

Talk to HER, not to him


Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. What a bunch of hogwash (no reference to grinch's extreme post).

Girls your/her age:

a. Do not really know what they want.
b. Want the "bad" boy (or a least a good buy with a "bad" streak)
c. Do NOT want Alan Alda

Guys your age

a. Are always in competition with one another
b. (any age) Can be **********
c. Only really understand a smack in the head sometimes.

If she can have her head turned by this guy, she can have it turned by any guy that does the same. You can't stop that. Recognize the mating ritual for what it is at your age. Watch the Discovery channel for a few nights, catch the eps on primates and you'll get the idea. We haven't progressed very much in a few hundred-thousand years.
 
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post-203951
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Fizzmix

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Thanks a lot guys, you've really helped out a lot. I talked to my girlfriend about it today. I asked her and made sure that she agreed with me that it was a problem. She is going to tell the guy tomorrow that she only wants to be friends with him, and nothing else. She also agreed that if he continues being this way, she won't be friends with him. I really do want them to continue being friends, so I hope that that is exactly what happens. She has told me that if he flirts with her, she'll make a greater effor to recognize the situation, and remedy it early. She told me that I'm more important than him, and preserving our relationship is much more important. I WILL NOT be beating the crap out of him, but thanks for the tip.
I'm Canadian, what do you expect?


Again, thanks a lot guys. I'll give an update in a few days to either:
a) give you some good news
or
b) ask fore MORE advice!


~!~ FizzMix ~!~
 
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post-203976
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DanG

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I'm very happy for you, Fizz. I think you've taken the correct approach and one that should turn out the best for you. Best of luck in your relationship with this girl.
 
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post-204021
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mbriant

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I hope it all works out for you in the end Fizzmix, but I think jpelg's response really nailed it.
 
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post-204052
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Budgie

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I'm glad it worked out.
 
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