Manic Depression... folk who suffer from it...
Jul 30, 2008 at 10:25 PM Thread Starter Post #1 of 69

AudioPhewl

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...aren't those who are diagnosed with it. It's the people around them.

My sister has suffered with this for years. I've seen the good times, struggled with the bad ones, and am currently in the middle of something new.

She's all grown-up now, married, living in a rented house. Her husband is a good man, who keeps himself to himself generally. He's had a hard time outside of the marriage, struggling with the loss of his mother, and suffering with his own depression. My sister does little to help him with anything.

My sister on the other hand... she does nothing to help herself. She claims she's unable to do anything around the house most of the time, she doesn't work, she doesn't take the dog out, or bother with her family. But as soon as one of her friends asks her if she's coming out for drinks, she's out the door without any hesitation.

Before they were even married, she'd been "fooling around" with her cousin. He was young and inexperienced, she has a controlling and manipulative streak to her. The poor sod fell for her big-time, by the time she'd finished leading him up the path, he'd ended up all but suicidal. All this went on when she was with her husband, before they were married. To this day(some 4 years later), he's all but blind to what really happened. He think my cousin had a crush on her, and she turned him down. That's so definitely the tip of the iceberg... she was crawling all over my cousin on more than one occasion. It didn't go beyond that because of his actions, not hers.

They've been married now for over 4 years, with many ups and downs. She's certainly slept with 2 other people, one of which her husband knows of. And I've got it on very good authority, from a friend I've known since 2000, that she's admitted sleeping with at least one more.

One night, around a month ago, when on a night out(he was drunk), her husband asked one of her friends(we'll call her V) if she'd ever been unfaithful. Her friend told the truth - that she believed she had. This led to my sisters final overdose attempt, and she spent a couple of nights in hospital.

To this day, I don't believe she's been at all truthful to her husband about everything. I used this as a leverage against my sister - she'd had her friends "rough up" the girl(V) who answered truthfully that night about her infidelity. She's been sent ***ty text messages, she's been shouted at, given death threats, and punched last night. She's also told everyone that this girl wears a wig(she has alopecia).

My sister seems oblivious to the fact that this was all bought-about by her actions, not those of this girl.

I've basically told my sister that she either gets her "friends" under control, and the hassle to this girl(V) stops, or I'll spill the beans on everything to her husband. After a couple of dozen text messages, with a lot of shouting talk, I think she's decided that I'm totally in the wrong, and she wants nothing to do with me.

Which, right now, suits me quite nicely!
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She's a pain in the arse.

Sorry, there is no real reason to all this, I just wanted to rant some of this out.
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~Phewl.
 
Jul 30, 2008 at 10:52 PM Post #3 of 69

AudioPhewl

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She is taking treatment, she's on lithium and anti-psychotics each day. Whether or not they're really doing the trick is another story...
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~Phewl.
 
Jul 30, 2008 at 10:54 PM Post #4 of 69

aaron313

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Quote:

Originally Posted by AudioPhewl /img/forum/go_quote.gif
She is taking treatment, she's on lithium and anti-psychotics each day. Whether or not they're really doing the trick is another story...
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It's difficult to find the correct dose, so she needs to be upfront with her psychiatrist.
 
Jul 30, 2008 at 11:04 PM Post #5 of 69

AudioPhewl

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She's a compulsive liar, to boot. Lies about really big things, right down to totally insignificant things too. I never know what I can or can't believe...

It's very easy to sit back and see what the real problems are. It's so much harder trying to talk some sense into people suffering with it. Especially when they don't want to listen.
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~P
 
Jul 30, 2008 at 11:14 PM Post #6 of 69

Suntory_Times

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Well yes, it's a very intrusive experience having someone tell you what is wrong with you. Especially when it's about you're state of mind. I had family and friends telling me something was wrong with me and saying I have OCD, I disagreed strongly however now I suffer from OCHD (which the main difference is I can't see the 'craziness' of my own actions most of the time). That bieng said, drugs aren't the ony answer.

However, to me, it sounds like you're sister is just stuck in a very tennager style of mentality where everything is about her and she doesn't really give a flying 'd'uck about anyone else.
 
Jul 30, 2008 at 11:40 PM Post #7 of 69

aaron313

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I've gone through some really rough times in the past several years. First, I went through a months-long bout of depression two fall semesters ago. I couldn't concentrate on my schoolwork, of which there was too much, and I was not performing up to my unattainable standards. It all ended when I had a panic attack during a final and left Berkeley.

The next fall I dropped my classes in the middle of the semester because I could not control my mood at all. I would get back an exam, and fly into a psychotic rage.

Finally, I got help, and things are much better, but far from perfect. Look at how much money I've invested in this hobby in the past four months. It's absolutely stupid, and I can't control myself. On the other hand, this hobby has saved me, because I get great pleasure from listen to my music now. Still, I take on far too much work with the only goal being to upgrade my system. It's all going to blow up on me at some point.

Until then:
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Jul 30, 2008 at 11:57 PM Post #8 of 69

FallenAngel

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She sounds like a real piece of work and I really don't think the medication will help much, just mellow her out and mess her up more. As nobody gets a headache from an absence of Tylenol, people don't act like that from an absence of medication, likely from other reasons. It's just the philosophy of doctors to automatically prescribe things. Some real kick-in-the-ass therapy would work wonders, sessions with a physiologist would help. Medication as last resort.
 
Jul 30, 2008 at 11:57 PM Post #9 of 69

kramer5150

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She first has to come to the realization that she needs help, and can be available. Counseling, therapy, and medical disgnosis. Start with that.

Good Luck!! Its not easy living with someone who is mentally ill.
 
Jul 31, 2008 at 12:08 AM Post #10 of 69

Palantiri7

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Treatment starts with the correct diagnosis, so I hope she was correctly diagnosed to begin with. Do you accompany her on her trips to see her psychiatrist? Many psychiatrists like to get the perspective of other people close to the patient, as, all too often, patients don't exactly paint the whole picture! I hope she doesn't have a personality disorder in addition to bipolar disorder. Anyway, I wish you both the best.
 
Jul 31, 2008 at 12:22 AM Post #11 of 69

olblueyez

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Quote:

Originally Posted by FallenAngel /img/forum/go_quote.gif
She sounds like a real piece of work and I really don't think the medication will help much, just mellow her out and mess her up more. As nobody gets a headache from an absence of Tylenol, people don't act like that from an absence of medication, likely from other reasons. It's just the philosophy of doctors to automatically prescribe things. Some real kick-in-the-ass therapy would work wonders, sessions with a physiologist would help. Medication as last resort.


Bi-Polar is a chemical imbalance and if you look up the symptoms then you will realize lying and spending too much and denial are just a few of the symptoms. It is a condition that must be treated with drugs (mood stabilizers) but the problem is most people are only diagnosed with the symptoms such as depression and anxiety and manic behavior and are treated with anti depressants and that is always temporary at best. A couple of years with a Psychiatrist to obtain the correct drugs and dosages and then a lot of therapy is how to go about things. Cold turkey or a swift kick in the ass only makes things worse. Most Bi-Polar people are like alcoholics and deny they have Bi-Polar and swear they don't need medication. Denial is the first thing a therapist will look for. You will need to watch her take her medication and go with her to see her Psychiatrist. If not then she will lie (to you and the doctors) and not take her pills and you will never make any progress. Her husband will have to do these things I guess. It took me 3 years to get my wife to take her medication on her own and it was a extremely rough road. I love my wife and we live through it every single day, and because I forced her to do what was necessary, there has been progress. Dont just go thinking you will talk some sense into her one day, that is a fantasy.
 
Jul 31, 2008 at 12:26 AM Post #12 of 69

alex1pdx

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Quote:

Originally Posted by AudioPhewl /img/forum/go_quote.gif
She is taking treatment, she's on lithium and anti-psychotics each day. Whether or not they're really doing the trick is another story...
smily_headphones1.gif


~Phewl.



If she is consuming alcohol while taking those medications, they are certainly not effective. In fact taking psychotropic medications with alcohol is very dangerous. I wonder if her physician knows about her alcohol consumption?
 
Jul 31, 2008 at 12:30 AM Post #14 of 69

aaron313

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Quote:

Originally Posted by FallenAngel /img/forum/go_quote.gif
She sounds like a real piece of work and I really don't think the medication will help much, just mellow her out and mess her up more. As nobody gets a headache from an absence of Tylenol, people don't act like that from an absence of medication, likely from other reasons. It's just the philosophy of doctors to automatically prescribe things. Some real kick-in-the-ass therapy would work wonders, sessions with a physiologist would help. Medication as last resort.


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Mental illness is nothing like a headache. Please don't talk about this subject unless you have first hand experience or are a doctor. I can tell you that without medication I'd be crippled. You are correct to be wary of blindly following doctors, or thinking that you can't choose your doctor, but medication is not the last resort for bipolar... it is the first resort. Do you know what a psychotic break is? That's what happens when severe mental illness is left untreated.
 
Jul 31, 2008 at 1:05 AM Post #15 of 69

digger945

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You know, there are institutions that are usually listed in the phone book, that can help with both the psychiatric and chemical needs of your sister. I speak from experience, and am very grateful to the kind and understanding folks who helped me so much. Some people (myself included) can even get to the point where they can manage without medications.
 

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