Sounds like you’ve got it bad…
Some fairly random thoughts (made before spritzer‘s more meaningful contribution):
I’m no electrostatic headphone designer but I have admired (and enjoyed) various electrostatic transducers over many more years than I would like to admit. My Quad ELS57s were made in 1970 and I still use them almost daily and that goes for some Lambda Sig Pros and the SR5s. The SR5s have though recently been displaced by some Senn 650’s but I still have them near to hand. I suppose what I am trying to say is that while no expert, because most of my stuff is so old I have over the years had most of it apart to clean, fix or ‘improve’ it.
Now it seems to me (IMHO etc) that the electrostatic transducer as a concept is seemingly very simple and can be stunningly good at making music. The big but is that there looks (to me at least) to be a fair amount of magic needed in making a successful one. For what it is worth my own assumptions in making a pair of electrostatic headphones are that:
The stators need to be quite rigid, only slightly conductive and have lots of holes in them. (Certainly the SR5’s I have had apart have very nice gold-plated perforated discs). But there again I am looking at a pair of AE Eggo satellites on my desk that have perforated metal grills that look ideal stator material. Its not that the stators are conducting current, it’s just that they are holding an electrostatic charge that varies with the audio signal. Stainless steel is probably perfectly good. Solid silver might be nice from a psychological point of view but in reality it would be no better than SS and would tarnish. Some people have used what we call matrix/Vero board - drilled pcb material with lots of parallel copper strips ) They are after all just capacitive plates, not conductors. I am not sure about the gold leaf option, as real gold leaf requires quite some skill to apply properly, and anyway I doubt that you can buy it from a DIY store. It comes in small ‘books’ about 6-Inches square and is very difficult to use without destroying it. I am not sure how much it costs but it is real beaten (very thin) gold. Drilling an un-etched copper clad PCB board might be a better way to go. Drill (say 3-500 .5mm holes in a 10Cm) disk of glass fibre PCB material and then de-burr, polish and lacquer the surface. If you paint on both sides your ‘copper screen filters’, that might work if they are nice and rigid. Martin Logan uses painted perforated (steel?) stators for their loudspeakers. You will need to keep them dust protected as I understand ML owners eventually find out…
You need to be able to reliably hold the stators away from the diaphragm by around 1mm or less, and the spacer needs to be a very good insulator. Again un-clad PCB material might be an option.
The diaphragm is a whole mystery in itself… It has to be light (slightly) conductive and flexible, though I believe that the tension across it is critical for frequency response and output level (to lose - arcing, to tight - no bass). So it probably needs to be in some sort of frame or ring. Mind you my Koss ESP6s have quite floppy diaphragms that look like they have been painted with conductive silver paint. Their bass is a bit down so old age might be creeping in here. Making a conductive diaphragm is (as you know) an art in itself, some people just ‘polish’ the surface with a graphite pencil. Have you seen Sheldon Stokes web site on electrostatic speakers? If you go the graphite way you might consider using a high value resistor in series (say 1-10meg Ohms) to keep the conductivity down.
You have to keep the transducer dust tight and the stators away from your ears or the loud notes may be shocking in more ways than one! I think that the dust covers could be made with something like (what we call) ‘clingfilm’ food wrap. But there again the stuff Stax uses is very much thinner and more flexible.
As far as I know, with the exception of the tube energisers, most driver boxes use step-up transformers to drive the stators (at 250 to 500ish Volts) with the audio signal and a ladder (forget the name - diodes and caps) network to provide somewhat more DC bias volts to the diaphragm. There again the bias voltage will effect the dynamic qualities of the headphone. But you can probably get an old Stax box quite cheaply.
Of course you could also restore an old set of Stax phones with a lot less trouble than making your own. My own 20+ year old phones started making odd noises, so before dumping them I had them apart and noticed that the diaphragms were a bit cloudy (like dirty window panes). So with nothing to lose I just got a clean, soft, slightly damp cloth and gently wiped away the fog. Result perfect working headphones again. With some home made silver wires to the energiser they sound only slightly less good than the Lambdas. Old Stax electrostatics are not expensive…
I think that’s enough waffle for now, hope it’s further food for thought and my respect to ericj and spritzer.