[Flasken]

Recently I've been doing something I promised myself I would never do.. Drink alone. I've had some trouble I don't feel like discussing here, and have grabbed a few beers and turned on the music. The beer stops my mind from spinning uncontrollably, and the music, well, the music is just something I like.

I feel I'm getting into something I don't want to get into, so here I am once again asking for your advice.

What I want to know is, what can I do to freeze my brain when, late at night, I have way too many worries?

 

[nanahachi]

sorry to hear about your probs, flasken. i know that feeling quite well (the constant stream of thoughts you just want to go away)

i wish i had a solution. i tried to find whatever distractions i could (talking to friends, wasting time online, playing videogames) until i finally couldnt stay awake any more...but mostly just felt like crap, never seeing an end in sight.

while those old problems have disappeared, if you find a cure, let me know, because i know it will happen to me again.

take care.

 

[gloco]

Watch a movie, play a game. Do something that will keep you from going for a beer. Try snacking on nuts or something, drink lotsa water. I don't much about having a drinking problem, but those are things i tend to do when my worries start taking over.

Have you ever talked to your parents about your alcohol drinking?

If not your parents, maybe someone else close related to you?

 

[Flasken]

guys,

If I said this to my friends and classmates they would probably say "cool".

I'm just afraid this will turn into a problem in the long run. It is not a problem currently, but I have a feeling that stopping it before it becomes one would be the most sensible thing to do.

It's currently 2 o' clock in the night and I'm on my fifth beer. I feel great

That's a lie. I don't feel great, I feel numb. Which is far better than feeling pain, which I did before opening that first beer.

I am a person who takes the easy way out all the time.

 

[john_jcb]

Flasken

Everyone has problems, you are not alone in this. No matter how much you drink it doesn't change anything that is impacting your life. When you are done drinking everything is still there that troubled you in the first place. Seek some help, preferably professional, and address your issues. From reading your posts I would suggest that you face the fact that you have a drinking problem and get some help there too. It is easy to give advise much harder to take it and follow through.

 

[DarkWolf]

Ya, you should find something to do to distract your self. If you start drinking too much, things will only get worse. You should also try to avoid eating too muchm but better that than over drinking. I don't have much experience to draw on, but how about decaf coffee and vitamin B?

I know a little bit how you feel though. I often find my self bored silly and in a constant state of thinking there is something I'm not doing that I should be. It can be hard sometimes, but I pass the time here, talking to friends, playing the ocasional computer game and listeing to music. Right now I'm about to go watch Star Trek. Good luck Flasken, I hope things look up for you soon.

 

[Flasken]

john_jcb,

I think what I really need to face is not my drinking problems, but the problems in my life. When I stop avoiding them I will have no reason for drinking.

Actually, there's only one reason that I'm drinking... I'm confused about a female friend's feelings for me. The next time I have the chance I WILL ask her how she feels. Nights like this one suck :/

 

[john_jcb]

Distractions like drinking are just temporary band-aids. Face the root cause and you will be better of in the long run.

 

[wallijonn]

lots of exercise before going to bed and a small glass of wine before retiring.

farmers and lumber jacks sleep like babies.

ever try meditation while you're asleep? i used to be able to see thoughts as little balls with gravity fields, and could see them being generated in my mind; they looked like small balls of light that got bigger and bigger, brighter and brighter. i then trained myself to float between the balls - and my thoughts vanished. of course you'll eventually be able to discern the different sleep patterns - they feel like shifting a clutch - until you're in delta pattern. but what about dreams?

everyone has sleep problems - the less sleep the more problems. if you can't stop thinking, then just look at your thoughts. i used to worry about meeting my boss after a screwup. "if he says this, i'll say that. and if he says that, i'll say this." after playing out 1000 scenarios, what happened in the morning was ALWAYS different. so then i just gave up trying to anticpate what would happen and let myself be instanteous.

exercise more. go jogging 2 hours before going to bed. a nice warm bath or shower and a glass of red wine is all you need. can't sleep? change your bedsheets.

 

[braillediver]

I was in the Navy so I know about drinking.

Drinking is an escape from your problems. More of a symptom than the real problem. Everyone has problems; it’s how we deal with them

Most problems seem insurmountable and all that but in reality there isn’t much we can do about them. So we seek escape instead of just accepting them.

Having been in rehab the telling thing is you are asking for help. Denial is the biggest problem and nothing can be done until the individual asks for help. I got kicked out of rehab since your problems are more interesting than mine. But I’ve been dry for 20 years just to spite them.

Oh women, it’s hopeless. As I was dating and wanted to meet women so I asked my married friends to give me some insight. I’ll share their conclusions.

“Women do strange things for apparently no reason.”

So that cleared everything up for me?

At least you have good beer in Europe.

Best of luck friend.

 

[stallion11msu]

I don't know whether you're an athletic person Flasken, but regardless, I suggest going for a run. I used to go for runs at 1 or 2 am, no matter the weather (and often the worse the conditions the better in fact), in order to relieve stress or just take my mind off of something that was eating me up inside. I would strap on a portable and headphones and just run wherever I felt compelled. I know it sounds cliched, but it works. Endorphins are natural opiates and they seem to ease my worries to a fair degree. The key is to just be spontaneous about it - no planning needed. I promise it'll make you feel better.

 

[ServinginEcuador]

If at 16 you build drinking as your escape mechanism, you're in for some very serious problems later in life when the real things come your way Flasken. Alcohol is NOT the answer, learning to cope with life's difficulties and problems is the way to cope. Escapism will make you weak, and when you're sitting in class one day and your teacher starts yelling at you that he/she's gonna fail you, your gonna want to go and get a drink.

At your current rate of escapism you're in for trouble in the very near future. THEN you'll really have problems. Try wrecking your parent's car for starters. Sounds extreme, huh? My brother did when he was 17 and drunk/stoned. He couldn't cope, and my family paid the price for it.

Your too young to have problems like your running from, so yuo'd better find someone in whom you can confide and call whenever you are in need. If you face these things alone, you'll feel alone, and never deal well with them. It's amazing how healing it is to talk something like this over with someone. You quickly find out a couple of things: one, you're not teh only facing that particular problem; and second, they might be facing things MUCH worse, and it'll put your problems in perspective.

 

[setmenu]

Sorry that your soul is tormented at the moment Flasken.
Your posts always give me great pleasure and I am saddened to
hear of your strife.
Can't say much that will make you feel better but I hope that time and plenty of music and a few beers will help.

Best regards

setmenu

 

[vwap]

Hey Flasken,

Sorry to hear that you're having girl-related issues. I'm sure most of us have been there and know exactly what you're feeling. I know its quite cliche to say it, but drinking won't make your problems go away.

I'm not entirely sure what you feel when you drink, since I've never had a beer [or more than a sip of someone else's cocktails..], but I'd suggest this: Similarly to stallion11msu's suggestion to go running, go somewhere quiet... A few years ago when I was having similar problems, I jumped on my bike and didn't come home until several hours later. With nobody to distract me [the occasional pedestrian excluded], this gave me time to think about what was going on, and what to do about it. In a nutshell, find somewhere or something to do that's comfortable and that you don't need to concentrate hard on what you're doing. Take a walk/job around the block. But instead of trying to drink it away, do some thinking about the issues involved. While it may hurt to dig deep for the true answers, it may save a bucketful [or more] of hurt feelings later.

This, and whatever the issues are, don't jump into anything too short-sightedly. [Unless, of course, that's what you're looking for.] Especially at your age, there's much more to life than girls. You're young.. go enjoy life with your friends. Like braillediver said... "Women do strange things for apparently no reason." I can vouch for this... and you should really just enjoy life without needing to submit to the whims of a female.

Additionally, if you're not sure about something, don't commit. This is from personal experience. You'll save everyone involved hurt feelings later on.

Anyway... that's just my $0.02 worth...

Good luck with the girl, by the way.

 

[dohminator]

yeah, if you can get into some therapy/counseling, I would highly recommend it. They can help you to face your problems and to cope with them. Including alcohol abuse, which is what you would probably qualify for right now.

You need to learn to cope without turning to alchohol. The longer you keep this pattern up, the more it will become ingrained into you, untill everytime that you are having problems you start drinking.

There isn't much more to say that hasn't been said here. I wish you the best of luck in fixing the problems in your life. Hopefully everything works out well in the long run.