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I was doing the same when I was younger actually, but with Xelento, you should be able to use larger tips, they are made out of a really good silicone.
I like to think that it has more to do with the depth of insertion, shallow insertion IEMs tend to have larger soundstages, Xelento sounds better with a slightly shallower insertion rather than with small tips and deep insertion.
I also noticed that Xelento tends to isolate good with large tips as well, the oval shape and large margins of the tip really help with this.
With ie800, I can't use anything bigger than round medium, but with Xelento, the second largest work like a charm, this is why with Xelento I'd really recommend tip rolling.
I agree with you tho, it affects the overall balance of the FR, so that might also have an effect, in particular larger tips and shallower insertion might pull back some of the midrange, which in return gives a larger feeling to the sound.
Yeah, in general the distance between the eardrum and the drivers will have an effect on the soundstage, and I have verified that on various occasisions comparing custom vs universal of UERR, U12, and H8.2. What I meant here, in case of Xelento with universal only fit, a rather short nozzle, and small driver venting, I personally didn't find a noticeable soundstage expansion change when tip rolling. Everybody will have a different experience due to their inner ear anatomy, but due to a short nozzle, the battle here is to find the most comfortable fit without them falling out of your ears and with an appropriate seal to control bass impact.