A Poker Hand Hierarchy for Press Victim Stories
Oct 23, 2009 at 9:14 PM Thread Starter Post #1 of 1

catachresis

Headphoneus Supremus
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Oh, the heartlessness of it all!


Quote:

Now, had a 98-year-old grandfather reportedly climbed into the same basket and soared into the same skies, the fright would not have been as large. Oh, CNN would have broken from its regularly scheduled programming to cover it and so would have local reporters. But few care about 98-year-old victims. In fact, in the hierarchy of victimhood, young beats old, female beats male, domestic beats foreign, fur beats scales, defenseless beats well-armed, pregnant beats nonpregnant, and kittens beat everything.


"Oh well, your flush of defenseless nuns abducted by The Shining Path gets the pot. All I had was a pair of escaped pet pythons in the Everglades."
 

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