Originally Posted by gopanthersgo1
Well, neither of us are really ready for it, and lately we have kinda been a little distant and such, not to mention we're both virgins and it's embarrassing and awkward as heck, not to mention I'm 15 and she's 13. (she is really mature for her age, though) :/ I don't know, it's never been a sexual relationship at all. I just think it kinda needs some time and for life to happen, but her mom doesn't really like me taking her to dates and such, maybe in a year or 2, but then there's the thing about me going off to college in 3 years and I just can't see how a relationship could really last.
As kids so young, especially her, things can get complicated. It's an amazing opportunity to grow and learn because you are so young, but trauma when you are young forms opinions about many greater things as you grow up - dont become overly cynical no matter what happens and don't be quick to judge. That being said, because you are young many options to get over this are not clear -- you probably don't want to address a psychologist because you don't have power over him or her and you can't use sex to get over this, etc. and bevause you are so young, especially her, I'm skeptical as to whether she'll understand what's best for her - regardless of her maturity, there will always be stubbornness in her. If you are really good friends with her, I world say it's worth talking to her about the sh*t that has gone on in her life and help herself feel better about who she is. You like her for many reasons, and can probably appreciate her better than she can herself. That makes you a candidate for helping her get out of this. Furthermore, this will be more effective than just telling her to stop cutting. But kids go through phases and change quickly too -- naturally, she may get over cutting. So if you can't help her at all, still have hope - but nonetheless try to speed up the process. Remember, you are kids, so don't act rashly -- think through what you are doing. And understand that whatever happens, even if things go to hell, everything you did came out of your love for her and you learned what it meant to selflessly care for another, possibly above your own health. But if her parents want to interfere, etc, I would say let them. No matter what you think, they probably know better and even if she doesn't want them to, you should let them for her own good -- it's what true friends do. But above all, you seem like a very smart 15 year old. Use your intuition to guide your morality, but remember to think about the good for others when doing so -- the greater good doesn't exist in a world marred by selfishness.