Head-Fi.org › Forums › Misc.-Category Forums › Members' Lounge (General Discussion) › Rant warning: A Lesson In Manners, or "How NOT to get someone to give you advice"
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Rant warning: A Lesson In Manners, or "How NOT to get someone to give you advice" - Page 3

post #31 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by zzffnn View Post

 

^ I would ask the seller in this way:   If it is still available, I will pick it up in person with cash. When and where can I meet with you?

That way you sound more sincere to start with. Concise and productive communications save time and make it easy for both parties.

 

As an example, after reading a well-described for sale thread from an established Headfi member, I often start with "I will take it. Please let me know your paypal".

Alternatively, I may say "I am highly interested. Please help me to confirm the following items: ......."

 

People on Craigslist are rarely serious though; some may tell you to meet at XYZ and never shows up. A forum in your university or eBay may be a better place.

Yeah I guess I should try that as well and not go with the casual craigslist message, but I didn't exactly say anything out of the ordinary but have gotten quite a silly responce.

post #32 of 76

I just had a potential buyer for a pair of Phones who didn't like the additional shipping cost to get the phones to him in Brazil. I had calculated the additional cost using the USPS website postage calculator. He felt it should be less because he'd received other packages from the US for less. He suggested I box and label the phones and take them to the PO to have it weighed so I could tell him the exact shipping cost which he was certain would be significantly less than my calculated cost. WTF? I should drive 8 miles to the PO, stand in line and then come home and PM the exact cost because he thinks I'm charging too much? Self-centered is just one of the things that came to mind.  I sold them to another Head-Fier.   

post #33 of 76

It's your prerogative to decide not to do that, but many sellers do, and it's within a buyer's right to request it, as it's within the seller's to deny it.  Things like this are also cultural in some cases.

 

If he said it rudely or accusingly, that's another story.

post #34 of 76

I had a guy tell me he was coming this weekend to buy a couple of things off me. Instead, he cancelled (which wasn't a big deal) but then asked if I could meet his friend in the city at 1pm on Sunday who would buy a camera from me. So, I said, have your friend contact me. Said friend didn't contact me until after he arrived at 1:15 pm, then sent me a message. Was he expecting me to go to the city and wait for him (at a cost of $8 or so return) when I wasn't even sure he was going to come at all? Holy cow.

post #35 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by Radio_head View Post

It's your prerogative to decide not to do that, but many sellers do, and it's within a buyer's right to request it, as it's within the seller's to deny it.  Things like this are also cultural in some cases.

 

If he said it rudely or accusingly, that's another story.

I have over 100 Buy/sells on Head-Fi, probably half are sells and I've never had a buyer ask me to go to the PO to get an exact shipping cost. I've had a few question the cost, like buyers in Australia and Singapore and I just give them the USPS website and let them calculate the postage themselves. Sometimes they go ahead with the transaction, sometimes they don't. Shipping outside the CONUS can be very expensive. What ticked me off is he felt it was OK to ask me to spent my time & effort because he THOUGHT the guy in the PO would give me a lower shipping price. This was after he visited the USPS website and verified my shipping charge was reasonable.


Edited by fatcat28037 - 10/15/12 at 12:50pm
post #36 of 76

I get a promise from a new member that he would come back and give me feedback after I sold him a new set of headphones and as I am trying to build my selling and buying Head-Fi profile, I do wish to have it. Guess who doesn't have that feedback even after express promises?

 

Ok, I honestly don't really care and it wasn't even a express promise that I forced upon him. I just told him, it was a customary thing here and it would be nice and he said he would.

 

Whatever

post #37 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by bowei006 View Post

I get a promise from a new member that he would come back and give me feedback after I sold him a new set of headphones and as I am trying to build my selling and buying Head-Fi profile, I do wish to have it. Guess who doesn't have that feedback even after express promises?

 

Ok, I honestly don't really care and it wasn't even a express promise that I forced upon him. I just told him, it was a customary thing here and it would be nice and he said he would.

 

Whatever

Leaving feedback is an imporant part of any transaction, it's how we built credibility for future buyers to guage our reputation.

 

I wouldn't hesitate to contact the buyer again explaining how important it is to you and the HF buy/sell forum that sellers/buyers document their experience.

post #38 of 76

Sorry to hear this Rob.

 

Just want to feedback that all my pms to "seniors" and administrators had got very helpful and respectful replies. It's just sad to see some community members can't practice the same.

 

Thank you all for responded to my stupid questions. :)

post #39 of 76

Wow.  You mean people PM you and solicit advice, without any kind of previous interaction?

 

I'm not sure "please" and "thank you" would cover it.  It just seems far too presumptuous, somehow, to PM someone you've never interacted with before and ask them for something.

post #40 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vuroth View Post

Wow.  You mean people PM you and solicit advice, without any kind of previous interaction?

 

I'm not sure "please" and "thank you" would cover it.  It just seems far too presumptuous, somehow, to PM someone you've never interacted with before and ask them for something.

 

To me, even receiving a "please" or "thank you" would be at least something.

 

Recently I've received just one-liner questions - literally!! There was no address to my username, no pleasantry greetings like "Hello"/"Hi", and definitely no "Please" nor "thank you in advance". It was straight into the business of "Which <has more of this> and <less of this>?", and that was the entire content of the PM.  I felt such a question didn't deserve any response...and what happens? I receive another :p. I've still not replied and probably won't.

post #41 of 76
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnakChan View Post

 

To me, even receiving a "please" or "thank you" would be at least something.

 

Recently I've received just one-liner questions - literally!! There was no address to my username, no pleasantry greetings like "Hello"/"Hi", and definitely no "Please" nor "thank you in advance". It was straight into the business of "Which <has more of this> and <less of this>?", and that was the entire content of the PM.  I felt such a question didn't deserve any response...and what happens? I receive another :p. I've still not replied and probably won't.

 

Indeed, that's the kind of thing I get a lot of, and I will never reply to.  People who cannot understand the basics of human discourse and civility are going to have to look to someone other than me for advise.

post #42 of 76
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skylab View Post

 

People who cannot understand the basics of human discourse and civility are going to have to look to someone other than me for advise.

Ha!  People like that always look for advise rather than advice.

post #43 of 76
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Radio_head View Post

Ha!  People like that always look for advise rather than advice.


wink_face.gifwink_face.gif

post #44 of 76

The ones on Youtube are even worse that I get. And they are "those" kind of questions. We were all their once but none the less a bit annoying when people want you to compare EVERYTHING TO EVERYTHING. I have asked a few other reviewers the same questions so its not like I am ridiculing them, but it deals with very obscure computer equipment, beats and other stuff to said headphones are the ones on Youtube.

post #45 of 76
Okay.... If this has happened to me.. I am SURE you guys have had this one. A whole NEW LEVEL of rudeness....

WHen I get a request I have sometimes gone through VERY lengthy PM conversations or spent days checking back on a thread to make sure a guy gets his questions answered. Simple ones like what's an amp? Why do I need an LOD? What is open vs closed? Explaining DAC etc....

Then after all this, the guy says something ok he might pick it up in "a few months" OR EVEN WORSE he had already decided before you helped him he knew already the besting thing in the world and he was going to go with that......

IF YOU ALREADY KNOW... THEN WHY DID YOU ASK?! I feel like answering....

Does it ever seem like people are asking questions just for the sake of asking questions? With no intent to buy or be helped?
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
Head-Fi.org › Forums › Misc.-Category Forums › Members' Lounge (General Discussion) › Rant warning: A Lesson In Manners, or "How NOT to get someone to give you advice"