Great post Romy. Sorry to hear about your friend as well, sadly our mind is one of the worst ways to go :/
On a lighter note, tea. For Chinese greens, I would check out Teaspring. Everything I've had from there has been fairly good quality for the price. Their oolongs are supposed to be fairly good, although I haven't had more than a sample from that selection.
For Japanese greens, I fully recommend O-Cha. Every Sencha I've had from there has been phenomenal, but make sure you do a little research on steaming methods before you buy. I bought some deep steamed (fukamushi) sencha from there as one of my first green purchases. While it had a very umami flavor (grassy and slightly salty), I hated it. I prefer asamushi, but you will be your own judge.
Also if you haven't gotten one yet, I would pick up a gaiwan. For nicer teas, you can see the price is steep. A good porcelain gaiwan will last you forever, and you can brew anything in it. I have a 150ml one, which is good, although for oolongs you may choose smaller. Also with a gaiwan, you can do multiple steepings very easily. Some smokier oolongs are good for up to 8 or so steepings, gradually going up in time with each steep. There's an art to temps and timing, so if you're curious either research on Teachat or PM me for help :)
Another useful tool for Sencha (and gyokuro if you feel fancy) is a kyusu. Now you can get one in any shape and size you want. Check out the Tokoname section on Artistic Nippon. It is a "sorry about your wallet" place, especially if you enjoy the art :) I personally had a small kyusu for about $65 that was ideal for 1 person, but it shattered in a dropping accident :/
As far as an all-in-one, I'm a big fan of Norbu Tea. The owner's name is Greg, and he is EXTREMELY helpful when it comes to deciding. A couple of my favorites:
This tea is the definition of smoky goodness. And you can steep it SO MANY TIMES.
And if you haven't tried it, get some Pu-erh. From Greg, I have a brick of this:
If you'd care to try some of that (or a couple other Pu-erhs I have), just send me a message. Pu Erh is probably one of the hardest to get into, simply because it's almost gambling. There are fakes of the big companies such as CNNP and Menghai, and every year will taste different, although will have the same flavor profile. Newer Shu will smell like dead fish (quick fermentation), while newer Sheng (slower fermentation) will taste so powerful it is, for me, undrinkable. While older Sheng is preferable, it is also very VERY expensive, depending on the maker, type, and storing conditions.
Another couple good sources are:
Jing Tea Shop
As for the many many others, I haven't used or communicated with them. Yunnan Sourcing has AMAZING prices, but order in bulk, the shipping (and wait) will kill you.