Headphone system giveaway -

-- After the (Rapture) Apocolapse , as I won't need it as the angels sing ~

Rapture’s back on! Should I sell my home?
Commentary: Doomsday is Oct. 21, so get your finances in order

— The world is coming to an end. Again.

 Harold E. Camping, the radio “Rapture” guy out in California, has told his followers that the world will end — or, at least, that all the Chosen Ones will get raised up to Heaven — on Oct. 21. (Camping gave this update after Saturday’s big letdown, his second.)

 I know what you’re thinking: “What does this mean for my personal finances?”

 Harold Camping, the broadcaster who predicted the world's end on May 21, says he got it wrong — but not completely.
 

Rapture on, Rapture off , Apocolyptic Rapture now ON again -

 Here are 10 personal-finance tips other than my free giveaway.

1. Sell your stocks, now! Equities are a long-term investment, only appropriate for a portfolio of more than a few years. You don’t know where you’ll be on Oct. 21. And hey — if you’re one of the billions “left behind,” the panic is going to create some awesome buying opportunities on the stock market anyway. Go liquid.

2. Stop paying into your 401(k). That goes for your IRA too. Dollar-cost averaging my eye. What are you saving up for? One way or another, we’re all out of here. Even if you’re left behind, End Times is only going to be seven years. Spend that money now.

3. Sell your home. Housing’s another long-term investment. Oh, and on the day of the Rapture, says Camping, about 3% of the world will suddenly disappear to Heaven. That’s going to leave a lot of empty homes — further gloom for house prices. If you’re getting ready for the Rapture, rent.

4. Don’t wait for that brand-new 2011 Lexus. Why bother? The 2011 models aren’t coming till August. You might only have two months to play around with it. Get that new car now.

5. Short oil, industrial commodities. We’re going to lose millions of people when they get Called. That is totally going to take the pressure off resources worldwide. Say goodbye to $100 oil and $4 copper. And industrial production’s going to tank anyway.
 

What the biggest hedge funds are holding: W.R. Grace, Potash and Viacom are among the top holdings of the world's largest hedge funds, Alistair Barr reports.

 • Hedge-fund secrets to beat the market
 • More hedge funds lured to new source of capital
 • Buying Sony and Japan’s bad news
 • LinkedIn investors need to do the math
 • Krispy Kreme to the rescue
 • Fight your fears about retirement future

6. Buy gold. Yes, this is the moment the gold bugs have been waiting for. Even those holding certificates in gold ETFs are going to be in trouble. Buy bullion coins, like American Eagles or Krugerrands. These will be the only currency. End Times are Gold Times.

7. Stock up!  You are going to need a lot of food, water and other essential supplies. Cans of soup, nonperishables, beef jerky: Get them now. Don’t forget toilet paper. Nothing will make you want to go to the bathroom more than witnessing End Times, and toilet paper is one of those things you’ll really miss when you no longer have it.

8. Sorry, but you still have to file your taxes. The extended deadline is Oct. 15. But End Times won’t kick in till six days later. Bummer. Imagine if you don’t file, figuring “Hey, a week from now I’ll be out of here anyway,” and then the big day comes and you don’t get called. Then you’re going to face a triple-whammy. You’ll be stuck here on Earth for many years of turmoil and tribulation. You’ll be heading for eternal damnation. And you’ll owe the IRS a penalty and late filing fees. It will totally suck.

9. Fire your accountant. The good news: Taxes are going to be a lot simpler in End Times. Amid all the turmoil and misery, who is going to have time — or opportunity — to itemize? You’re probably just going to go with the standard deductions anyway. Save yourself some money.

10. Buy a gun. What goes better with God and gold? When End Times come, you’re going to be glad about packing heat to defend your home from marauding bands, giant winged beasts with the heads of a lion and suchlike. This is great news for gun maker Sturm, Ruger & Co. RGR
+0.68%   No wonder the stock is doing so well this year. Do
investors know something?

 Good luck on the new/used H.P. system giveaway after the Apocalyptic Rapture on or abouts mid - October , to be awarded by my selection of enterants with the best submission in this tread or by PM with reasons why you should be awarded my listening station gears .  Oh, and if you have any more questions for me, please do remember to get in touch by Oct 21. I’m not expecting to be returning any PMs after that.

/ Rapture on, Rapture off, Rapture ON , again  ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by cifani090 

So where are my headphones

Mine - Not to be in your possession , the same as your reading comprehension skills, apparently ;)  lol

BTW, due to the overwhelming amount of PMs and for entertainment value, all responses to my give-away should henceforth be made within this thread , and not by PMs ... O.K. , shoot !

Quote:

Originally Posted by tjohnusa 

That's funny!

 

Wait, funny, funny ..... Funny, how ...

Dialogue:

Henry: You're a pisser, you're really funny. You're really funny.

 

Tommy: What do you mean I'm funny?

 

Henry: It's funny, you know. It's a good story, it's funny, you're a funny guy. [laughs]

Tommy: what do you mean, you mean the way I talk? What?

Henry: It's just, you know. You're just funny, it's funny, the way you tell the story and everything.

Tommy: [it becomes quiet] Funny how? What's funny about it?

Anthony: Tommy no, You got it all wrong.

Tommy: Oh, oh, Anthony. He's a big boy, he knows what he said. What did ya say? Funny how?

Henry: Just--

Tommy: What?

Henry: Just, ya know, you're funny.

 

Tommy: You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little farked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you?

 I make you laugh, I'm here to farkin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

Henry: Just., you know, how you tell the story, what?

Tommy: No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know?

 

You said I'm funny. How the fark am I funny, what the fark is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!

Henry: [long pause] Get the fark out of here, Tommy!

Tommy: [everyone laughs] Ya motherfarker! I almost had him, I almost had him. Ya stuttering pr!ck, ya. Frankie, was he shaking? I wonder about you sometimes, Henry. You may fold under questioning.

 

// That's funny ;)

Quote:

Originally Posted by BobSaysHi 

way to avoid every curse word in that scene.

 

- As well as give away that I subscribe to, wait for it... FARK News :')

Back on and in transition to topic, being funny !!!
 

Oh yeah, the giveaway is most surely ON , and only dependent upon a date certain to be set by Harold E. Camping (funny guy, a real pisser) ;')