This joke is totally awesome. - Page 37

Music Lover #1:  Yeah, I went to hear Carmena Barina last night - loved it!

Music Lover #2:  You mean "Carmina Burana."

Music Lover #1:  No, it was Carmena Barina.

Music Lover #2:  You say "Carmena," I say "Carmina."  You say "Barina," I say "Burana."  Carmena, Carmina, Barina, Burana - let's call the whole thing Orff...

Jimmy: Ever seen mothballs?

Billy: Cerntainly, in my grandma's house all the time!

Jimmy: Well, how do you get it's little legs open?

Why was the blonde staring at the bottle of orange juice?

The label said concentrate.

Woman says to her husband "I've lost five pounds".

Husband replies "Gee, I hope you find them".

And then the fight began.

Woman says to her husband "I've lost a pound".

Husband replies "Gee, honey, you forgot to put your makeup on.".

And then the fight began.

What do you call a woman who has lost 95% of her brains?

A widow.

Little known facts:

In Iran, attempted suicide is a capital offense.

First car in high school date, parking with a beautiful blond -

following 30 minutes of kissy face -

" Come-on babe, please ..."

" NO "

" Come-on, get in the back seat "

" Aww, no "

" But why, why not, why don'tcha' wanna get in the back seat ? "

" 'Cause "

" Why not ? "

" 'Cause, I wanna, be with you " 

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hi-Finthen 

First car in high school date, parking with a beautiful blond -

 

following 30 minutes of kissy face -

 

 

" Come-on babe, please ..."

 

" NO "

 

" Come-on, get in the back seat "

 

" Aww, no "

 

" But why, why not, why don'tcha' wanna get in the back seat ? "

 

" 'Cause "

 

" Why not ? "

 

 

 

" 'Cause, I wanna, be with you " 

 

I don't get it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tangster 

I don't get it.

Is your hair blond

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tangster 

I don't get it.

The joke wasn't worded well, but basically she's a blond and she thinks that he's asking her, and her only, to get into the backseat.

"You want to get in the backseat?"

"No, I want to be (up here) with you."

My first reading was also confusing because I took, "I want to be with you," as "I want to be (in a relationship) with you."

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpiderNhan 

The joke wasn't worded well, but basically she's a blond and she thinks that he's asking her, and her only, to get into the backseat.

 

"You want to get in the backseat?"

"No, I want to be (up here) with you."

 

My first reading was also confusing because I took, "I want to be with you," as "I want to be (in a relationship) with you."

HaHa, yeah thanx, the type was awkward , and I hate having to explain jokes , especially to blonds ;')

Nonscript ~

Went to visit a friend in a really small town in outback Australia. We went to the town's only pub and while we were sitting there every once in a while somebody would call out a number like '32' and every one would laugh. This went on for a while so I asked my friend what was going on. He said everyone had been coming here so long that they all knew all the jokes. So they just numbered them and when someone wanted to tell a joke he just called out the number.

So I thought I'd give it a try and called out '97'.  Everybody in the pub roared with laughter for a long time. I thought 'that must have been a good one' and asked my friend what it was. He said 'they never heard that one before'.