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Jaben Fear... - Page 2

post #16 of 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlyssaBelle View Post

Erm... Jaben is a chain of shops all over South-East Asia and the one i was talking about was the one in Singapore and yes, with regards to my age i really am very young... more than 13 of course though^^

as for my bad experiences, i have had way too many that i disliked anyone standing behind me and if anyone stands behind me i walk behind them and because i am in a girls' school its ok, i can survive when i am around family or friends.... and no, nobody's going to want to go with me to Jaben... i'm the type of girl everyone just ignores and remembers only when they need to copy my homework(sigh, i'm really letting loose huh?)

 

and as to the supposedly friendly staff of Jaben, when i entered it was as if i was disturbing them... i felt bad and you know what happened... gods, i am pathetic..

 

Yipes, that makes me cringe. Seems someone needs a virtual hug. Alright, so I'm assuming you're less than 18...? In any case, you're probably around my age (15), so I might be able to help (recovering "emo" (I always hated that term) so I think I know enough about the teenage mind to give advice). Cravenz pretty much said a good amount of what I was going to say, I'll add more when I think of it, oh and send me a PM if you wish. I'm free all day because of plans that didn't pan out.

 

I doubt you're the girl everyone ignores. I thought I was the person everyone used, but when crap happened and I was at my breaking point (which was why I was on a hiatus last year and the beginning part of this year if anyone actually noticed my absence), I found out there were actually a lot more people that cared about me than I thought.M

 

I doubt it went on like that, unless they were at the climactic point in a song. And they probably didn't expect a young person, especially a female to walk into the store with intent to try stuff out so they were surprised.

post #17 of 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ishcabible View Post

 

I doubt you're the girl everyone ignores. I thought I was the person everyone used, but when crap happened and I was at my breaking point (which was why I was on a hiatus last year and the beginning part of this year if anyone actually noticed my absence), I found out there were actually a lot more people that cared about me than I thought.


post #18 of 204

The guys at Jaben is always friendly and helpfull. (Y)

post #19 of 204

its been long since i visit Jaben

 

you should not be afraid, your wallet should.

post #20 of 204

@charlie~ Well said.=D


Edited by MrNobody - 7/7/10 at 8:08am
post #21 of 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by AlyssaBelle View Post

I know this may sound very stupid but i have this weird phobia regarding males because of some bad experiences with the opposite sex in the past so when i went into Jaben today(i was so excited as i was like dreaming of this day cuz my schedule is usually packed so today was my only free day^^) and saw only like 6-7 males with the whole shop quiet and all, i freaked and ran as fast as i could out of there so it was like one foot in then before you can blink i was out of there...

 

please, please help me, i really want to try out the earphones there but with my heart thundering away in my chest that's kind of hard to do... i really need to get over that strange phobia...(probably why i'm in a girls' school...)

 

-sad-


Bring someone along. I expect them not to share the same interest in you in earphones. Bring one who is quite interested in music and who has some crappy earphones. Jaben will do the rest :)

 

May i know what kind of bad experiences you got? Haha im very curious about this kind of stuff(kaypoh). Its ok if you dont share.

 

I misread the last part to testing an earphone made your heart beat fast. Now thats one earphone i want to try. XD

 

The main thing is just to be comfortable with yourself. Its a very difficult thing to do but the more you are comfortable with yourself, the better you will feel about yourself.

 

post #22 of 204

this 1 thing bad about the internet.... real world interaction is slowly diminishing

 

right? we SMS more than we talk on the phone... We email to our boss, who is just behind us...

 

 

 

BRAVE UP GIRL!!! if you are genuine buying, speak up, those who have the cash is the KING

 

first step to more buying in the future? how about stepping into a LV boutique?


Edited by alamakazam - 7/7/10 at 8:44am
post #23 of 204

Oh, the irony....
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by alamakazam View Post

this 1 thing bad about the internet.... real world interaction is slowly diminishing

 

right? we SMS more than we talk on the phone... We email to our boss, who is just behind us...

post #24 of 204

you could bring someone who will go with you..doesn't matter if this is their hobby or not just as long as they go with you.

 

it was mentioned that they do have some female employees so you ask for them if you are in the shop.

post #25 of 204
Quote:
Originally Posted by alamakazam View Post

this 1 thing bad about the internet.... real world interaction is slowly diminishing

 

right? we SMS more than we talk on the phone... We email to our boss, who is just behind us...

 

 

 

BRAVE UP GIRL!!! if you are genuine buying, speak up, those who have the cash is the KING

 

first step to more buying in the future? how about stepping into a LV boutique?


^ That really sounds like what a Singaporean would say to me 

 

xX on bringing a friend. I am sure among your closer friends, there should be one or two that likes music. Or if time allows, bring your parents there. Too bad I can't afford the luxury to go back now, if not I should pay jaben a visit.

 

Speaking of which, what kind of earphone you are looking for? 

 

all these young people here really makes me feel old...

post #26 of 204

Pepperspray the entire place, then try out headphones while everyone is incapacitated.

post #27 of 204

*puts on the fake  therapy accent*

Well lassie, ya gotta remember somethin. Those laddies are as afraid of you, as you are of em

*switches off fake accent*

 

While i'm not generally afraid of the opposite sex (some ladies excluded. but i'd have a REASON for that, or a time), i do have a fear of crowds, serious offline social anxiety (lack of practice!) and such. 

 

While its still hard (and ironically my headphones are pretty much my linusian safety blanket in the outside world), if you panic, focus on breathing, what to say. Life is but a stage. Try to act more confident than you feel- sometimes i think i can win oscar in that. 

 

Also at that age most guys bloody idiotic. Then again, i'm not sure at what age guys arn't (myself included ;) )

 

@happyfi : ... that's wrong. 

 

Teargas is better for whole rooms 


Edited by faileas - 7/7/10 at 4:08pm
post #28 of 204

AlyssaBelle: 

I've been going to Jaben for a few years now and from what I've observed, the worst that could happen is you'd get a few surprised looks when you walk into the store. I'm sorry that's the way it is, but as pointed out before, audio tends to be a male-dominated hobby. 

 

Anyway, it usually isn't long before one of the staff attends to you. As suggested, bring a friend if you can, but if you can't, don't miss out on visiting Jaben. It's a great little store that gives me a similar vibe to the one I find here at Head-Fi: friendly, unpretentious folk who are enthusiastic about a hobby, and can't wait to help others get started on it too.

 

All the best, and sorry about your wallet...

post #29 of 204
Thread Starter 

Thank you for your kind words, you sound a lot like a friend(male^^) whom i met online... he was a genuinely nice person who talked me out of a lot of things that were bad for me... he's kinda like an angel, whenever i need someone to talk to, he's there and best of all, i can talk freely without censoring myself for fear that i would offend someone and he would never judge me...

as to you age, i don't think you can be that old... just that wise. Jaben is definitely a stepping stone or in my words, a test, that i have to pass... i will try again this weekend and see how that goes... and what you said last, was classic Brian^^
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by cravenz View Post




heh. don't worry about your age. I just made that comment cos' I was feeling old.

 

In terms of your experiences, don't let it cloud what you want to do in life, don't let it stop you. Take walking into Jaben as a stepping stone, or do something even smaller. Challenge yourself. There are bad people in this world, but that doesn't mean everyone is a bad person. There are good people too. I believe everyone is good, everyone is nice. It's just who they choose to be nice to, that's the difference.

 

I cannot claim in any way to know what you have or are going through because I'm not you and I haven't been through it. We've all had bad times in our lives, but the sooner we tell ourselves to move on, the sooner the sun is gonna start shining. Speak to some of your friends about this and if they really are your friends or even family members, I'm sure they'd be willing to go with you.

 

I know how you feel about being left outside of the group, but it's partially cos' you have that fear in you. The moment you step outside of your shell and try a little something different, you might find that things aren't as gloomy as it sounds. I'm an international student where I am and there are hardly any international students in the course I'm doing. No one really knows me 'cept to get notes, but it doesn't bother me. I made the choice not to be that sociable. But I know that when I try to put myself out there, I bridge that gap. Sometimes, it requires effort on our part.

 

If music is your escape, like it is mine, use it to your advantage. Know that to get to that music, to that goal, you have to take a visit to Jaben. It might be frightening to you, and partially cos of your experiences, it's instilled some fear in you, but you have to overcome that. You've taken a step joining this forum which is dominated by the male gender, and you've taken a further step to talk about your fears. Sometimes it helps to be careful what you divulge, but I think we all here, if I could say, want you to be happy and want you to experience what you want to experience and at the same time, overcome your fears.

 

Don't look down, don't have too much dissonance in your mind, we could never undo what has been in the past, but it's a new day tomorrow, it's your life and the choice is yours. Tell yourself what you want, what makes you happy and go for it.

post #30 of 204
Thread Starter 

Yup, apparently after i started this thread, Vanassa from Jaben sent me a message, it was very sweet of her and i was touched.
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by rawrster View Post

you could bring someone who will go with you..doesn't matter if this is their hobby or not just as long as they go with you.

 

it was mentioned that they do have some female employees so you ask for them if you are in the shop.

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