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Co-worker commited suicide

post #1 of 69
Thread Starter 
I received a call today that a co-worker I've known for over 3 years committed suicide this morning. He no longer worked at my location, but I worked with him for over a year and a half everyday. He was a jovial, happy, balanced, peaceful, and level-headed guy that was very optimistic about everything. I'm still in shock and completely baffled at why he would choose to take his own life.

Something that makes this all the more disturbing is that he sent a suicide note at 9:55am this morning to everyone at work, except me. Now, I hadn't spoken to him in about a month, and we were really just acquaintances, so I'm not sure if this was on purpose or maybe just a coincidence. His email said something to the effect of "Get out while you can, this place eats at your soul, and it took my life."

He was actually promoted awhile ago, and I took his old position as the laptop technician at our company. He taught me how to solder, how to troubleshoot laptops(inverters, LCDs, etc), and was just an all around great guy. His sense of humor was great, he had several hobbies, and he was incredibly intelligent. We even hung out a few times outside of work.

I've known several people that have committed suicide before, but this is the first time that I have seen ZERO symptoms of anything even remotely hinting at sadness or depression beforehand. He seemed to be very comfortable with himself, his job, and his life in general. It's really upsetting that such a genuine person made such a permanent decision on a temporary problem(whatever that was).

I guess it goes to show you that no matter how well you think you might know someone, you can never truly know what they're going through on the inside.
post #2 of 69
"Get out while you can, this place eats at your soul, and it took my life."

unfortunately, i think most people would characterize their jobs this way.

thank god for audio and music. keeps me sane.
post #3 of 69
Sorry to hear that. I think he just forgot your name and is not mad at your or anything.
post #4 of 69
This happened to an old co-worker of mine as well. Same situation. He was happy, had several hobbies - married with kids. Apparently he was going through a divorce, had job problems and shot himself while driving down the freeway. Very strange, but like you said things go on inside people's head that no one knows about. Sad.

No job or spouse is worth your life, but things get fuzzy while wrapped up in all of that.
post #5 of 69
I wouldn't read into not getting the email too much...sorry to hear, that's terrible news. you know several people that have taken their own life? wow...I don't know anyone who has...
post #6 of 69
I agree, do not read to much on why you were not copied on the email. Who knows what was going through the person's mind. I hope he did not leave behind young kids. Sad, hope you fair well.
post #7 of 69
A lot of people keep it inside... some lie to themselves, pretending to be someone else...to the point where they *are* two different people. Not sure if this is the case with your old friend, but it's a possibility.
post #8 of 69
Sorry to hear this. I wonder if things went downhill for him when he moved to his new position.... Or, like someone mentioned above, something else in his life maybe went downhill.

I was surprised at my 20th high school reunion to find one of my core group of friends in HS had killed himself as well. I hadn't been in touch in several years, and he was what i would have called "solid" as well.

But life can be cruel, and he went through a break-up, loss of job, and who knows what else all in a very short time.

I found people often wonder "what if I could have...." in situations like this. But in many cases, people can hide the stress & pain enough in casual dealings that it's tough to notice.

Bottom line, I hope you and folks at the workplace are OK, to say nothing of his family....
post #9 of 69
Yeah, I've had friends who offed themselves because of divorce, etc. Can't imagine that one, I'd be raring to party! All kidding around aside some of my firends who were very intelligent, witty and about the last person you'd expect to suicide have done themselves in over the years. It happens, it hurts, life goes on afterwards...
post #10 of 69
I'm sorry. Sadly, this is evidently all too common. I as well knew a 40-something gentleman, with *supposedly* a happy marriage, 3 beautiful kids, lots of material and business success, outgoing, jovial, etc. who drove to a cemetary and did himself in with a pistol. Years later, in speaking with his wife, she indicated to me that there were absolutely NO signs, and she is still shocked by the senselessness of it all. The only conclusion she drew is that depression is insidious, and can eat away at you without any overt signs. Which is why it is absolutely critical, and should be without stigma, that people should seek help if they feel depressed for any reason.
post #11 of 69
My highschool had a student commit suicide not too long ago, about two months ago really.

No one saw it coming, and there were no signs what so ever. You always hear ppl tell you to look for signs, and report anything suspicious, but that's pretty hard to do when there are no signs

Oh well.... stuff happens I guess
post #12 of 69
Sorry to hear about that. Hemingway's life kind of sums it up. He had such a full and rich life, that it seemed he could just live in the afterglow of his experiences. But he could not.
post #13 of 69
I tried to take my life over 20 years ago and thankfully enjoy life now no matter how ****** it gets. I feel for you and sometimes it feels like the weight of the world is too much to bear. Still saddens me as I feel this is the only life you will have. (atheist)
post #14 of 69
I have no sympathy for suicides. Suicide is a very selfish act. A friends father attempted suicide because of business problems and he didn’t succeed. So on top of all the problems the family had to deal with they had a suicide chump to nurse back to health.


Mitch
post #15 of 69
Quote:
Originally Posted by braillediver View Post
I have no sympathy for suicides. Suicide is a very selfish act. A friends father attempted suicide because of business problems and he didn’t succeed. So on top of all the problems the family had to deal with they had a suicide chump to nurse back to health.


Mitch
I think that its selfish itself that someone looks down on another person's life due to their single act of desperation while going through such emotional trauma. Suicide is not right, but to look down on someone who's emotionally already at rock bottom, just isn't right. You may not know it, but your views may be just putting more weight on the person.
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